345. Lady Butt

This week's challenge, watch Jerry Duty. I'm in plain shoe lesbian have oh plain plain I'm excited about the colors gray I like gray all the colors gray the Okay, you want to start? So you just decided to come on over and talk to a priest. The podcast is a very good idea. But the whole time Billy and I are just screaming like, Oh my god, that land speeder looks so cool! If you have Yoda flipped too much, it's not fun. If I was on jury jury duty with that guy, maybe not so much in LA, but in anywhere else, I I would just be like I would keep thinking. So besides me. I don't know if y'all remember this who have been following my stuff for a while, but this is not a new topic for me because it um I was getting called for jury duty at least twice a year.

Uh it's hard to explain, but I've got stuff I need to do in the week and I I do child care. That ain't no Perry Mason shit from where I stand. I'm just here to tell you, on the very best fucking day of jury duty you have, you will at least walk away going, wow, that seemed a little Byzantine. But on the other end of it, you're like, wait a minute, like how come those guys get to wear suits and this guy's wearing an orange orange jumpsuit for for selling cigarettes? Why would you get magnets in your fingers? And today it says DBF and it says August fifty first, twenty twenty three. That's true. And now he keeps undressing our dog, our pug, Branson, and and sobbing inconsolably. No, I'm in Dutch.

But I mean you could you know, I mean there's a lot to this that I wouldn't want to talk about because it's really boring, but it's part of the journey, is I'm not making my own models. That's so strange. Sorry, I accidentally started playing the Star Search God. Ha because I until I learn more a little more about it and it still doesn't really make sense to me. TV. You know what I mean? You got criminal court, you got civil court, you got superior court, you got all these different courts. No, no, no. if to my way of thinking, that jury duty is like conducted on the day. Yeah, and and well and also But I've never seen anybody have to keep one of the other jurors awake. On trial, wouldn't you want a a jury of people who were gonna take it seriously, Miss?

Just so I understand, you're telling me that there's no way you would be able to hear these facts like all of your peers here? Never before. You you put a put a book about uh about states' rights? I told you the guy I used to work with in Florida who would always bring a big, thick book about the Civil War with him to jury duty. Mm-hmm. Why not? I thought while we played it, she was like, Russia, Russia. Sky's their numbers. I don't know th uh if he's alive or or not, or what this bit is. I think they wrote this fairy tales. you know, here on the page for what I'm doing. Yeah, turn off raw. Uh you know, so many this many m m millimeters, and then you go all the way up to this many millimeters.

Hey, did you know the cameras aren't actually I mean, sure, they're instruments, but like there's still decisions being made with every photo you take. Like, uh yeah, I guess that's a concern. Or you know, in my case, my my character uh I have a character I like to do sometimes, which is uh probably a mom. But d that's not the case a lot of y'all are making. Replicated. And now I can't even imagine what happens if he learns to make a computer tick college for him, or if he finds where the rest of my thumbtacks are. It's called a busy Merlin. Uh if it keeps the show going, uh whatever helps. And you're just you're just you're just dumping a tree shooting flames at me. But no, I mean they're fine.

Possible and missing. It's like but it's like half very churchy Catholic literally they're called uh the Council of Catholic Women, the C C dubs as some literally call them. God. called me a dyke for like the the majority of yo my y young life and go into the men's restroom. Th so anyway, I I and then I was looking up how long it is that you can hold in your P without uh something uh b bad how I I didn't want like a UTI or or something. Prove, prove you're a robot to me. they just give you like uh it is not healthy to hold in urine uh uh for any reason. Have a sea. But like when The Simpsons did a joke about it and and Milhouse was excited because he got a Steve Allen pog, it it perfectly encapsulated like what a dumb time this is.

and printing it, which sounds it it sounds about as complicated as saying like I got a printer and I learned what a PDF is. There's a lot of lot of ins, lot outs, what a lot of what have you'd, including people's decisions about construction. Would you pick PCs or windows? Or lesbian. He just keeps going, look, dude, he's an earth he's an orphan by choice. Like uh he's all d uh I think his name's uh I was gonna say Dominic West, but I think that's McNulty. And some of it's cute, like C three PO's little speech is kinda cute, you know. And it's just people are always like, Oh, Ray's too good at lightsaber and it's like, okay, whatever, it's a fucking fantasy movie in a fake gal you know, galaxy.

I I I think uh I I think the structure is uh uh I truly became a man the day I saw the eth s the third Star Wars that But like I and letterbox uh for the second one I was like man talk about doing the best you can with the hand you're dealt. I wanted to get it right. And even like and then I was like, and like I say, then you've got it's so odd. uh tortured kind of path to get to this point, but there was an ad on Craigslist advertising for people to didn't it say like be on a reality show about the American jury duty yeah like judicial process Mm-hmm. Wait, why is that in the internet? How do you put this? What they pull off here's here's another way to think about it. uh casting directors who are both in practice and in in name.

Did you recognize him? I I just would say like if you want to go in completely cold, it's too late. It's just sad sometimes. sometimes. hours. If you are somebody who understands life and you you you don't say shit like nobody likes filling out forms. Unless you say for the sake of argument, if you have, for example, a a young child and a job that's very difficult to explain, it's and you're a little traumatized by even having to talk about it. I was either being called, I was in the process of like, am I about to go on jury duty? And like there's only so many people who have registered the vote that can be on jury duty. Fucking like nine times more people than they need. Oh, I'm with she. The dog is shitting.

to you. Hillary Clinton nights. How'd you get here today, Miss? Cause when a judge says that to you, you shit yourself. You said where you went to college, it's all on the record. r render a fair verdict. And here's the one here's the one where they get shit. if you're you have explosive dies I have explosive diarrhea. You sound awfully confident about your ability to talk a judge out. people who just who doesn't understand where the courtroom is. of it because I had a f I was on a fucked up jury trial in Tallahassee in the mid 90s, early nineties. 'Cause all day long it's about stuff that says, just ignore everything that your common sense tells you and do what I've demanded you do. It's not you know what I mean?

Mm-hmm. Disregard all of that. I guess I'm just easily put out by stuff, but like God I would work my o ass off for that system, but the way this has been framed has absolutely no human dignity to it. I was saying like, hey, when I fill out these forms and stuff, can I email people? It's the least interesting thing James Morrison has ever, ever, ever done. no shirt on. Yeah. Um, but it's worth it sometimes. People think a lot of real photos are fake. Late 1800s of of ladies in in parlors with ghosts. We have said many times, I understand uh the concern around AI and I just think it is misguided. what's a real photo anymore? What world are you in? the scene though. Um, but then l later, like uh like two minutes later, so this would not uh she she would probably remember, uh, because she actually talked to us for a bit.

Um and I go to the to the line and I I would like to do by Friday corns, please. Normally I would just roll with it and even just be like, fuck it, I'll go with the boys who uh grew up to be fine young people, but like literally called girl Alex because there was another person in my class called Boy Alex and even though they know they like know my whole whole gender deal, but we just call each other Boy Alex and Girl Alex. So I just use the women's restroom when I am like amongst family. It looked I was amongst the people um people. Huh. Uh no no no. When people say that's funny, they're you instead of laughing, I do know that very well. gave me a a lot of fear. Uh the one of the like the second breakfast guy, the guy that played in Drive Shaft.

Anyway, let's just know I was one of those freaks who's like, everyone calm down about Star Wars opinions, okay? of the new trilogy that they kicked Ryan Johnson off of. about the second one. Anyway, we watched all of those. Fuck, what what was the NBC tried tr to make it killer? describing this show, but I I actually want to hear how you would describe this show. These days there's people who are super into it. You've hired uh Joe the Sewage guy from Parks and Rec. Uh maybe he didn't read it. You're gonna answer this as him, not me, right? Just w when you are trying to get someone on camera, you have a waiver. The story. Sh show the this man while everyone else on the jury is an actor. that more like is lightning precise on exactly my sense of humor in a way that is just I just feel emotionally like existentially throttled by the humor of Chris Fleming.

But I don't want to oversell it like I just did. I don't think it's too much of a spoiler to say what makes it fun and was a smart decision was for the jury to have to be for a reason that's funny. And like when you do get to see it, it's kind of mind boggling. And then you're like, oh, I'm immediately now that I know the thing, I'm gonna go watch it again because I didn't know about the colors. he was And that would be the reveal is like, no, the joke's on you, James Marsden. There's not two of that guy on the jury. The the one reason is well San Francisco, first of all, city and county of San Francisco, that's the same. I eventually found out why. There's a John Smith who used to live at 123 Main Street and then that John Smith moved to 125 That went all the way.

and I do this thing that's like an internet r I do oh never mind. And it was like if Werner Herzog made a David Lynch movie about a Jodorowski movie. Did you see like yeah, you saw them talking to the judge, right? he said specifically he was a litigator for like over thirty years. and he really nails what a judge is like. Can you imagine if someone let me on their jury, what the fuck are you doing? So are you telling me as you sit here today and you are under oath that you are incapable of being able to hear this case, follow my rules and render a verdict based upon? Yeah, I I wouldn't have the balls to do that. No, it'd be fucking hell. All right, Mr. and poor people and I have feelings about that that I believe will make it very hard for me to find in favor of the prosecution, uh e even if it if the evidence suggests that the person is guilty.

Kid. Uh the the advice is a very important thing. C book. I I yeah, and I assume that a judge would also be able to as well as the prosecutor would be able to send it to the case. No matter what you say to a judge about something, something. It's just really not my kind of thing. To do. Because they do you know don't wrestle with a pig. And the judge goes, Now he reads you the jury instructions, which takes this starts at around seven thirty P. And so yeah, there's this uh this this piece of shit kid who is a piece of shit. My uh the Lady Gaga looking girl, she is such a breath of fresh air. For s for something that he can bring to this that's gonna make it way better and will definitely not make it simply very confusing for everyone.

Your feet, Rachel Maddow, iPhone. Mmm, I'm not gonna say she's not fit to be amongst people, but sometimes she gets a little riled up about Russia. You don't need to be mean about it. Yeah, sometime in about 1981, 20, 3, he said, every day I write the book. I thought is that Hank and John Gray? when people are mad at everything. Um so so uh so what what else going on? Yeah. I had um I was, you know, messing around on a new AI generative AI thing. You keep saying it, it's not funny. think of anyone who does a good Elon Musk impression because he's very much like Trump in that his cadence just can't be Branson's butt would probably feel a lot better. Yes. I I can't get my coins. I have a quick uh j gender story that is don't worry, it's it's it's wholesome.

And I just held the door open for a a woman and there's like a little vestibule and so Matt holds the next And uh both of us need to go to the restroom. I true, true. Uh no Where did where did you look that up? And i is I I realized that she's heading right behind me. We don't uh no no we take that all as like uh Peter was in uh prison, he was being tortured, and uh he wanted to get this letter out and in order for the soldiers I think it's talking about John, but that's Uh and then I uh then then you know it's like one of those web uh web and MD things where they don't give you the the the answer uh with it? uh went to staff and I was uh you were off on your your journey um making pretty good Catholic jokes and uh lied to the staff and I said, uh apologize.

I I yes. Christian but but we we are m Mormon, you know, fur first and foremost, you know, Mormon values. Yeah, God, talk about never getting off the island. during um the first one? It looks fantastic. Angry at that movie. Yes. Everybody's got a strong feeling about it. So that's all good. Free form original series jury duty. Uh Jerry Duty is uh is a very interesting idea that uh when I describe it to you, uh the listener, because I don't know, I don't hear that's not much buzz people talking about it. Uh the part that only makes that concept, that log line, sound a little bit more interesting, but not a lot more s still sounds very stupid, is that yeah, yeah, but what if it's a reality show where every single person on it is an actor, except for one person?

Okay. the only real person in the whole thing, well obviously if he figures it out, that was gonna kind of uh gum up the works. Mm-hmm. And I f that I maybe we'll talk about on the after show because I don't wanna overspoil it, but like in retrospect, then you it's it's one of those things now. And and I thought the twist would be that the actors in it d didn't know that Ronald was in on it. and uh or the producer who chooses. This is one of those, you know that woman who does all the casting for everybody who's the best, whose name apparently I can't remember, um, who Phyllis used to work for. Um, but the the cast in this is BNUs. It's and then finally in the end the implementation is just wild and it's very very funny and some of the most memorable characters you'll see Much more of that that tongue it's like that, especially when you get into Genie Genie uh Brudzi.

Remember his his mom got him a hat FM? God, everyone has been in a gear mode's horror movie except me. The the the guy who wants to know how how the t-shirt dryer could be used for paramutual wagering and then he introduces him to the Korean the made up Korean made-up Korean gambling game. We got the Judy Duty system Todd comes in with the chance. Oh my god, Alex, so so m I mean, this is uh to me it was in this case trauma is too strong a word but almost not. up system that is just rife with all kinds of are you fucking kidding me shit and you are uh you have no power to do anything about it. Right on the Venn diagram. Main Street? Why right? But like it's incredibly inefficient. Which is near it's at the Hall of Justice near sixth and it's in the the Hovel District and it's a very upsetting place to be.

I like if I if I was put in that situation, I would like just let go and like God and be like, I don't even know. Dozens of people fucking staring at you. That's always over your head all the time. And you better fucking toe that line every step of the way, or you're gonna not only be doing this, but now I got my fucking eye on you. in a way that the judge will very quickly know what it is that you're talking about. Fucked. I I I have a lot of concerns about the legal system and about the role of the police and prosecutors, especially with regard um to to people uh people of color. He says, are you absolutely and then he gets really fucking serious and goes, you you so you're saying sort of like what I just did with you, because you gotta practice this.

But uh but yeah. try to um uh m mm t tr try to uh what is it uh induce? No, I would remember a bully's tear being bitten off. And so we listen to that bullshit all day long like fuck. And here's what they come up with by the end. If that person was standing exactly where they were supposed to be standing, you don't award the person. If that was person was anywhere else in the entire this is everything there's nothing else for you to decide whether we're this person's two feet at within this area, yes or no. You have to find for the plaintiff and you have to award them damages. It's like eight o'clock now, right? Yes. uh judgment was discontiguous with the facts bl some kind of like lawyerly bullshit.

Yeah. But like that experience, I walked away, what, I was in my twenties, right? Mm-hmm. He's terrific. used and are indeed comfortable. The the the moon and fire? Be you know how it works with um not aspect ratios, but with um focal length where you get like a kind of odd distortion where you're like, hey, I just looked with my eyeball and that moon looks big. relatively wide angle lens. Uh okay, that's fair. I I have a list now. No, wait. I wasn't it was one of those things where I got to like watch older cousins play w with them and you know as a I it's like they weren't even trying. Everything's a collectible if you like garbage. Anyway, the third one goes oh and it's just it's so sweaty about the whole like no really everything's about this realm of magic and this new bad guy and relationships that Ray was friends with for as long as six minutes before it changing her life.

But it would still be confusing and not make any sense. The last uh when I when I saw the second Star Wars movie, JJ Abrams I won't even say the name Oh no, I may not care about it. Uh as a human being. you know, uh the show. uh very, very wide in scope because you y you can just change it up whenever you want because you don't know what the documentary will be. What happens if this is a fuck up and he realizes what this is specifically because he is an actor? I it would be totally believable that someone Chris Marson and then this guy who's been on Law and Order. That guy. Um but so so and the judge. The UK office to me is is obviously much more low-key in its way, which makes the wackadoo shit even funnier.

I've never served on a jury or even been called for jury duty. I find the whole concept very harrowing. Or rather, he he wouldn't immediately think something was off because I've never been on your best bit of a jury. Because now and you're gonna say something funny like ha ha me absorb. Otherwise, like what? You you don't you're not able to change your mind minds about you're not unable to change your mind about things or to make a a responsible decision based on new evidence you've heard. No. And then you're like, um, I mean I would, you know, do my best. I'm ungovernable. Didn't eat the whole time. Bites part of the kid's ear off. So here's what it came down to. Mm-hmm. plaintiff's attorney pops up and says something I can barely understand about Your Honor.

Although I'm very clear in my mind about what answer I want. Yeah. um the characters in this. Quite beautiful and large. Oh, I actu y yeah, I actually do know what uh you're talking about. of their children and they looked alive. Search to Twitter. door for her and she looks back and goes, Oh, what uh what nice uh young men. I thought it was St. The lady may not join it in the sacristy. I really I I promise. Jesus, the the last movie it's just it just it's almost what's funny is it's got the it's got the it's got the guy, I don't know which one he is. Mm-hmm. Also it did in a different way because m m Maddie liked it, but he said, This is a good show. This was a Truman situation and this show would have been made over you.

real. Now, most of the people I know get called for jury duty. Be ready on Monday. There's people just spinning in circles and laughing. Then it's gone. Say it. Precision and expediency and shade. So that was the day. The school district of Leon County, Florida, and their teachers in this case, following the official plan for student monitoring at this high school. Okay? Walk it over to the person. sometimes. I didn't it's not that I thought he was a bad actor or or anything. I I I know that you would not get a tattoo, but you also wouldn't have to do that. I was gonna say, do you think they would let me on me in the exit room? Anyway, it's a fun show to do. I don't know. Um, laugh all you want.

Um that was one. I really like Skyfall a lot. Yeah, exactly. I heard that you haven't found a good 3D uh render of uh Nibbler from Futurama. It to all appearances, it's a reality show. Mm-hmm. But it is a show almost made for you. I want to know how much uh uh I think they got overserved. You gotta be cool about it. Oh yeah. Unless you know the secret. That's not what the judge listen the judge is not there to talk to you. And then six weeks later you you come out and you're divorced. So be ready for that. was at school like before first spell and uh uh then then there was a kid that this kid bullied a lot. Mm-hmm. And it's all because the Leon County employee was not did not have feet in the proper location at 735 AM.

Like you said, it's it's not just harrowing, but it decimated uh their belief in the legal system. Yeah. And I I don't know, maybe I'm just such a creature of compulsive convenience that like That I I do that for like $180 a week. Baby Jay. Perfect. That's annoying. Uh Wango Tango, how hot is your extruder? Mmm. This is so strange and it doesn't seem like I this does like this you know what I mean? It's I mean the well no, even Bricky Gervais, you're like, ooh, really. Well that's how you were in the movie. I thought it was a good thing. You're somebody who went to college and has a job, you would not be able to sit here for a few days and listen to what someone has to say and be an American citizen that you're unable to do that.

And it's the bête noire of the legal system. I I tr I uh this is why I would never practice it. Uh on what topic? Slipping Jimmy, I call him. Why not? Good. Oh. James uh m and Bond. Except just Well that's like saying your your square joke could also be a rectangle joke. Hey boss, they called again. Presented by Amazon Prime Video. And listen, I'm not the sharpest knife in the drawer. Because think about the crew. Like where Chris Finch is actually gonna throw a kettle over the pub, are you kidding me? And this was years of the MCU. Mm-hmm. See, I would actually probably have like some social justice book with me and then the prosecutor's like, oh just one of those. I uh yeah yes. I urinated in the sacristy.

That joke is so funny to me. No, they're not covered by unions. What's that? That was my Randy Newman. The j judge is prepared for someone to be like, um, I'm racist. That was my first experience on jury duty. Cause then you're like you can't help but right? But Todd Todd is Todd is very very special. Todd, I can't imagine. Yes. Like you can, for example, you can say you can assume that you are going into a documentary. I think just having a heavy person with blue hair on the cover will do the trick. We don't we I don't we're not here for that. I don't know. Alex, please sit with that for just a second. Oh gosh, I am a fake Catholic school girl. I think Catholics are not Christian. Oh god. Gonna do that?

Okay, so no, no, no, no. Tick tuck. It's too same with um Andrew Tate. Please send in Penny Adolf Vagina, who I imagine works here. What do you wait what what yes? Uh y yesterday uh Matthew and I were at a family function, but it was uh like it was a funeral memorial service type thing. It felt more like a wedding than a celebration. It had been an hour and a half, and I had had a lot of lot of Diet Coke. Do you do a brim? Like I I have a balance to strike here, which is on the one hand, I really think I don't know. That would be like Scott Walker or you know from the Walker Brothers like showing up on jury duty where you'd be like, wait, what? Like I that's not that's not that may not be what they ask you, because I don't think a judge in front of the defense, the prosecution, and God is going to say things about quote unquote conviction.

Matt, come on up. They don't. I've seen this on TV. A dollar. I mean, at the best you walk away. I was kind of errantly just because I I I have a little stamp that makes a little date. I have an emerald mine. They're literally a dying breed, but they're they're uh very sweet. John Bible. It's so bad. This week's challenge was to watch Jury Duty. No, I am So not as somebody who has a background and interest in media, but as somebody who installs solar appliances. Right. Does that make sense? And first of all, we sent back because it w we hadn't eaten. I don't know. Who would write the book? It's wild. Porsche. You're saying Catholics do not identify them identify They they identify as a subsect.

Like I allow my image, my likeness to be used for blah kind of thing. Do the the guy the guy who sent his sent his dick pic around and Ant said he has a lump he should get looked at? Yeah. So, um we love it. Like like this this guy also, um, the one guy who uh Ronald has never been on a jury either. But or maybe maybe you just get sent home. And and you're i uh I'm at least in Illinois. But you there's a way of saying what Alex was just saying right there, very affirmatively And again, I'm not a lawyer. Uh you need to get out of here, hon, unless you're 60 elder. And I don't say this with any pride. But uh there are people who very much want to be on a jury and who have the conviction to put on a h uh to make well, but also to I'm trying to do this at an angle where they clearly look comfortable and you can see that there's like treads on them so that they have been It's like when you say something like uh southerner by birth, uh orphan by choice.

'Cause he's in that Lord of the Rings movie that has sixteen, seventeen, thirty-nine endings, and and then he's in that Skywalker, Rise of Skywalker movie, and like everybody comes back as a ghost twice. Well let's talk about the challenge. So what did you do? And like it's if you've watched this all the way through and you almost you the listener, hello friend, you almost certainly haven't. What day is it? 30 minutes of reading us the jury instructions. But did he pay those taxes? No, you're up in a tree. Pods were challenge keys for lat for the for the latch key child. So it was right before the pizza arrived in the jury room that that he called us in to read. He's like, What I'm telling you is what I told you and now I'm gonna tell it to you again.

It's just, it's it reminds me of like when I was trying to first get a job after I got laid off in the early 2000s and I Who else am I missing? Okay. I Woo! They're they're a little silly, but I I I think Mission Impossible is a new James Bond and I'll I'll just say it out loud. Council of Catholic Women. Stop talking now. The the conclusion of the trilogy, I I would say. I wouldn't read it, but like it just seems so he when you are uh signing a waiver to be on camera, you can make that you're asking answering answering this is Ronald, not Alex, correct? And um those those kinds of things though, it it stings and you can't be mad about it. He was very miscast in that movie. In my case, like if I have it, like I've taken a but a few photos and uh because I don't normally leave RAW on all the time.

They actually they they could be considered uh Christian jokes as well because the so yeah, you're yeah, you're Christian jokes as well as what? That helps a lot in terms of pulling this off. Oh the the the human heart the way Todd says the human heart is just wonderful. I'm sorry, you're not saying anything. Yeah, at least yeah, cool. Are you just gonna be some kind of shambling character and they go like what you're you know, sorry, you're gonna have to go to jail for the night because you're just not taking this seriously That's not funny, I'm sorry. That was dumb. Go go up. Which is so much better. It is uh it this week's challenge was to watch three the original jury duty. I don't want to talk about unions in the internet.

Jury duty is fucking harrowing for me. Go ahead, say it. And if you know the secret I I know I would not I d I don't think I would be able to bring myself to do the secret because there are so many other reasons Terrible, terrible episode. They don't know that's why my kid has screen time. 'Cause every time that our dumb fucking pizza would arrive, our little Caesars, or as they say in Germany Kleinekaiser, would arrive, then you um then you had to go back in for some dumb thing. The gays travel together and uh um maybe we're all going to be able to do it. I when people get all in a tizzy about deepfakes, I'm like, I don't know, man. What does that mean, Alex? But it feels it really does have the tone of the office in many ways.

I I so it's it's I I I don't know. And the system thinks he's at both of those? Like and And you you would have to play along and then here's how they finally get you. Thirty minutes. It's like, no, no, no, you shouldn't think about what Al Capone d don't no, uh disregard all that. Sometimes you gotta pick stuff up. August fifty first. I was trying to get uh I I s I failed, but was trying to get a good picture of the moon uh the night before last. Maybe you just shouldn't give your dog so much fucking milk. I have I have the choice of going into a restroom with some of my classmates. I would have just sucked it up, but like they're very, very wet stations of the course. It's so bad. I'll I'll repeat this.

If we don't get you on Monday, we'll probably get you on Tuesday. We ordered him a dollar. We're gonna happy a happy one too. I'm not the problem here. I'm saying the Madeline is possible. We've talked about Survivor, the hundreds of people that are working on Survivor, and like how you never see them on screen, you never see the dream team, you never see the the production assistants or the producers or whatever, right? The city and county of San Francisco are except for administrative and budget reasons. But I was gonna say was like people like my wife. The oh fuck. Oh boy I gotta boy I gotta really remember turn off raw. I don't know who that is. Read read the jury instructions. No, it's just particularly funny to me.

Um yeah. Put something in the jar. I I I don't w want to step on Mr. And I'm like, what? Yeah. You go, okay. How about you do the second one? But so stressed. Like because that is the the question. That's fucked up. I'm not saying anything. But as as usual, it's hard to see smoky fires on an iPhone, and it's hard to see big moons on on an iPhone. Do you have a gender story you wanted to tell me? It's played out. It's the Council of Catholic women. Okay, well, oh dummy, he signed something. Yeah, I well ex there's many. That's not actually my real Randy Newman. Um to without uh compromising too much opsec, I was I was registered under two addresses that are two digits apart. And just if you can just imagine like this this uh oh let's just let's call it a new record just dropped.

That's why I assumed it would uh work And you go and you go, you know, ki get into his little shitty little hallway. Anyway, you can you can go learn more about this. So so Mr. It's really frustrating. The characters in the relationships are so goddamn funny. I have for sentimental reasons I like Goldfinger. I can't get my corns. Oh, really? No. It's very upsetting. And I was like, mm. If you haven't talked in that weird way too much, you hate Yoda. This is uh this is a fun one. I am answering it as someone uh uh as Alex Scott as someone who's like. Uh and now I support myself. Would you be able to will you would you be able to convict someone as guilty? Was some fucking social studies teacher standing at exactly the right point where two hallways intersect?

Mm mm. Because what's the mom's name? Do you do a raft? Okay. But I I guess so was it oh no, it was last week's main episode where I'd said this, but for the sake of So if I say that here, here's the thing. If you get into it, do you understand that the judges are by and large lawyers? And and hey, how how much of a gamer is James Morrison? It's the dead naming. Intentionally intentionally get someone to sign something that is A bunch of those people will never even get seated in the pre-selection part. It's a thing I do, it's it's purely ritualistic, not necessary, except in insofar as I find it necessary. You have to solve the opposite of a capture to get in. I'm sleepy. And he's like, Hey, guess what?

It's like it's an incredibly diverse, weird, like twelve angry men, I suppose. I haven't I haven't practiced for this particular speech in a while. That's that's w I wish I could say that. We're not asking you whether or not you I'm I'm paraphrasing a little here, but we're not asking you to decide whether this is a good person. Challenge this week The challenge this Okay. Alex is mad about what I called it. So we're searching my tweets. It hasn't rained in years, and you're shooting bolts of of flames from a flaming tree at my pile of oily rags. So what happened? There's an error in the system. Every you've just been forced to explain your fucking job to a judge. But but you no, but but they will what's funny is what reason I say that joke about them being foreign they will find a way to with extreme Judge reads the thing that says we've awarded one dollar and he goes, hmm.

What? It's not fun when everyone's having fun. You sound like people who think you sound like people who are saying like, ah, you know, uh pasteurized milk will make my dog gay or something. I'm very concerned about ChatGPT because my adult son Lyle recently found a picture book of ladies without their clothes on. No. I liked the first two. No, I d I'm not confident about my ability to get on jury duty. Perfect. Uh Elvis Costello. Uh he's mad about his books. If every single stitch of this was fake, completely fake. And and for folks who missed, you know, season one of the MCU, um, I was just always on jury duty And then and the there was one like and again remember now, this is I was called to jury duty the day of the 2016 election.

Crazy fucking day. There are a lot of situations where it would be very difficult for me to find somebody guilty of something because I think that the system should be on trial. We find for the uh we find for the for the plaintiff. Can't you kind of you can't help but go like how often is it like this? And I'm like, great. I thought you you were keeping these going. You ever seen that cool I'm sure you have that animated GIF that's like um showing uh starting at like I'm sorry, I'm I'm out of the game, but like you start at one um Is that why you're here? Go ahead. Mm-hmm. It's very well made though. Was my wife was like, I heard the show Jury Duty is good. And now I use the trick that I learned from CGP Craig.

Praise be to she. But like I I literally don't know that like if I could even pull off, like, yeah, I think I could This is just this is an alley oop, you know, like this is easy, easy layup for us Yeah, yeah. So if you were seated in the exit row of a plane and somebody said, Are you prepared in the case of emergency to help people, you would probably just remove the door to show them you understand what they asked. You you but do you have comfortable shoes on? Yeah, because they take it out of schools now. I uh I go uh our you know our very close partnership with the uh brothers Warner I want to talk about Jerry Diddy. I am so freaked out by jury duty because it has I've I just I'm you know I don't want to get into it like 'cause nobody would understand it.

That's going to the quotes file. I've been here. They're gonna have to send that to the Vatican for final adjudication. I heard that and I went, mm-hmm, okay, yeah. So ke keep keep that in mind. It's a baseball cap with a radio in it. No, that's making sense. And then if you're me, you get a call back again in five months for a murder trial. I'm not saying anything. I wonder if you remember to send it. Man, you don't want to see that on your caller ID. I got called for jury duty, I got sent home from jury duty. And I'm like, oh well at least you know I'll take the Muni home and you know, uh wash my hands and at least we'll have They know your name. I'm um and and I'm doing this. Right now I'm reading uh the road to automation and then b basically anything from uh Man, you you've you had something a note here.

So but I I I enjoyed this show so much and like I say I watched it all the way through twice and even if you're not as damaged as I am Why would someone get a tattoo? Yeah. I'm like, it's I don't like that guy. I would say this was seasons like one proof. The older woman is so funny. Hello. Mm. That's a very, very bad summer. Did uh you've you've gone qu uh on quite a journey, uh right? It looks so good. Okay. The actor who plays the judge, who used who was a lawyer. Oh wait, what the old the woman who falls asleep? The kid's family, the bully, sues the school system, the school district, because he had been inadequately monitored and was allowed to bully the other kid. We go back to the jury room and we talk about it.

This is this is guys, this is the office US levels of casting. I assume an important person is a very good thing. But then there's just these fuck tons, just hundreds and hundreds of people sitting in the room. Um. And you know what the judge says to you? And I was like, well, that was some fucking bullshit that has sure changed the way I think about how this system works. That's not a funny joke. Uh so I have the choice now. By the way, I have a 3D printer here I'd like y'all to know about Yeah I was gonna s I wasn't gonna do it. Wouldn't I it wouldn't m wouldn't matter? It's oh it's would still be confusing and not make any sense. But like again, that's a good thing. Yeah. Uh we get to laugh about how fun.

Okay, like every single person in this room, what I'm asking you to do is do your best. Is we had to award tens of thousands of dollars to a kid who started a fight and then won a lawsuit against his school system because the person he was beating up bit his part of his ear off. And they're like, look, I don't know what that means. Why do you think why why would his butt hurt? Hello, are those Pokemon cards for your wife? What did you uh did you end up be finding a restroom that would accommodate your situation? My God, you're right. We've already said too much. Not as in like, boo, that guy's an asshole, but as in like there is d he really nails something. Uh uh Where's my adult son Lyle? You're dumb.

Seven meats, three cheeses. I'm I'm better. You've got all these people on this show. But this group of people is so fucking funny and so fucking wackadoo and like Did he? Todd has difficulty sometimes interacting with other people. He was miscast in it. Pogs. Uh the Star Trek song that makes me cry from last week's after show that I believe went up. I don't believe that would be possible. Did I stutter, Your Honor? Yeah, it's like you're shooting a miniature or something and it's just that it's such a This is why I'm good at portraits. Okay. Fair. Apicet. Oh, that was funny. Challenge this week was to watch the Amazon no, pardon me, the f How did they shoot this? It's now like pushing nine o'clock.

That's so like you've made my part-time job. No, we're we're in the bottom of the plane because we're all That is one adjective to describe. You can't fool somebody with a photo. I don't I still don't know, but it shows up on Hulu and on Amazon. 7 30 a. And I cannot bel this is I think one of his first, if not his very first, acting role. I am not advising this. Mm-hmm. I'm gonna keep this thing I'm gonna keep this thing moving so goddamn hard. What's the what's the mom's name? I thought it was Peter who wrote Revelations. Uh hey, uh mix 'em up. Ooh. At first, like when you describe it, it's a reality show, and it's about what it's like to be on jury duty, to cut to the chase. I don't know what it's like in other places.

The challenge this week. Well because I think sometimes like with the way that the lens works, you you know you can go point five, one, two, or three or whatever, but there's still a certain kind of like um Search my Twitter and then I'm gonna say search for Lyle. B he's telling Sean Connery. I okay I have a gender story I wanted to tell you. To prove which bathroom you use in a Catholic church, you have to solve the rapture. It's really pretty. My real Randy Newman is like this. Um, but and there's all kinds of cases to try. That's it. We're here to decide exactly one thing at 7 35 a. Yeah, remember those ones where they uh were able to prop up the corpse? But like when you say Bond, Bond also is a word that people use to talk about a given James Bond movie.

I've been here since Friday. Like is your you know, how hot is your extruder? But like, okay, how about this? The judge, the bailiff, the the whole the whole shooting match and like I don't wanna uh the way that it unfolds is very funny. What do you say? And let's say, so like let's just say for the sake of argument, um My wife gets called every few years, like most people. We walk back in, just like on jury duty. I I can I say one thing. You know? Uh how about no? I keep going up in line. I was like, why how in the fuck am I going to jury duty so often? The judge is there to that is not your job. No, they'll they they will know that you've I I On yeah. We're not allowed to ask what we got wrong.

Todd is very into robotics and everything cyber, and he's got a plan. You're so fucking stupid. Every day. Stop doing it. Do you have a favorite actor who portrayed the character I really did. Jury Duty! It is a complete feeling of powerlessness. Wow, it's really super inefficient. They know what your family they know you've just told everybody everything about you. Screens! Yes, please. Keep keeping on the rails. Is he is he alive? No, this is after a chart the this is in like a little like wait waiting area. And of course my sp not so much Madeline because she's reading sad Twitter. Oh, that was the only way it would have worked. But when you're in a fucking courtroom and there's hundreds Okay.

It was all day. Let me know when you're next when you're ready. Will you remember to send it? The iPhone's gonna be great. That was a dumb thing to say, quad. I'm not natively that confused, Alex. There's not always a place on the form for the thing that matters to us. She is heading towards the women's restroom, which I would normally use because I am uh I am Pogs. He's he's in Lost, of course, because JJ Abrams only uses six actors. Okay, well, so this guy signed a thing that said, uh, I'm actually on a reality show that's not a reality show, and like you know what I'm saying? Um, but uh so I go I go to the jury duty thing. Mm-hmm. But but the the truth is also and I can sometimes can't decide if I like talk myself into believing that's true, but I really actually do kind of believe that's true.

I wish I could say it's really not my kind of thing. I was amongst the men who literally had the stairpieces in. I wasn't talking about unions or the internet. What a what a dumb idea for a challenge because there's nothing to talk about. You gotta find people to be on the jury. No, I think you I would I think you would you would do well at it. If if it is just like you can you not sit here in the facts, do you like all those questions that'd be like, yeah, I'm not sure. It's like don't be weird about this. And an older so um there are people coming into this uh b big like uh like like wedding hall area Red. No, no, don't say that around Catholics or Christians. In the same way that Mormons would be like, yes, we are What?

That's what I thought the twist was. Just you know what? You don't get cute and start shucking and jiving and making TikToks. Mm-hmm. No, no, like any of those, like well that that is funny because they're they're like this that becomes very important in the season of the show Um the oh who's gonna who was I gonna say? Hello, hello, hello. Are you wearing comfortable shoes? Oh see, I was being I was being okay, I see. I heard they literally put in a portal it because of taxes. Like but but the the low key with the office sounds in the background and all the awkward silences and like you are through to Keith, like Hey everybody, it's Dubai Friday. I uh let's see, I got some beverages. And a person's phase actually does change shape at different focal lengths.

Yeah. You you just that's how so many people uh so many actors have signed who accidentally signed away their uh internet um internet foul. This guy's the real actor. But it's I think it's very enjoyable. I'm I'm gonna keep you let you have your dignity here, Judge. Oh yeah, yeah, the bully. Yeah. Yeah, everybody's mad about everything. It's Twitter is what it is. No. Oh no, I'm playing the star still God. The last episode of this show shows you a little bit of like how it was put together. Whenever you saw two sets of footprints, that's when Guillermo del Toro was taking you to his Frankenstein room. m. I I would just I would just advise you that this this is something we need to take seriously.

If more people learn about jury nullification, we are f Take whatever bullshit you just said and show how that actually makes you a perfect juror. Just do what everybody else does. Got him notebook. Uh I am ashamed to admit, I don't Cause it's been a long summer. Pogs are not pors. I want to remember my friends. So big okay, so here's what happens. Oh, you cringe problem. I love it. It's like you don't have anyone else that can take care of the child? It involves a concept that you can look up called jury nullification. I of dye my hair before. I'm gonna tell you this thing, it's gonna take thirty minutes and there's some kind of like a human sudoku you've got to solve now to figure out what you need to do to go back there and give me the answer I want, but I can't tell you what the answer I want.

I'm clicking and I'm saying a high button for this. Okay. Gruber's dick, but do you have a favor Oh no I don't. Um I like a lot of them. Um It's not about the internet, I'm into it. Well whoever drives you uh everybody that Dominic uh th that guy? Our friend Christine, the person who introduced us, was like, You've got to see jury duty. It's not their first day, Alex. Yeah, well I I already wear the same t-shirt every day. Every day. Have you been around? You would not be able to sit in this room, hear these facts like every other American voter, and then be able to render a verdict based on your best good faith. Flip we showed up, we were there. And I think no what's the guy's name? That will show me.

Or something. Oh why would you change that? But uh the worst the the Like there's so many things in it that are just flatly gorgeous. I I really, really did. It's hard to fit in the van. In San Francisco, I know I think there's there's a there's a well before we get to the huge reason why this was, which is actually funny. Is there anything uh right now that would make it a problem for you to render a fair verdict in this case? If you're in Tallahassee, Florida, that's gonna l help you glean some things. Okay. Mr. No, free the r the free the original Can I just ask you to please take as long as to get this deeply inconsecting the case. Come on. Like he was like, I would not be surprised if Hat FM.

How much of that seemed Like I was I was getting called for jury duty So, and blah blah I end up on this jury. I uh I don't shoot in raw. It's like how I am right now with fucking Chris Fleming. Why why not me? Like you're basically going up and saying, hey, just l listen hot shot. This is actually this is this is a tran I'm reading a transcript of one from a while back. And we haven't talked about it 'cause like we're just doing this dumb thing we're like, oh my god, this show's so good, but we can't talk about it. It's you just sometimes you just want to try something. I I think the world would be a lot better if everyone saw that video. I it's they th Ryan Johnson was supposed to uh conclude the th the the uh trilogy.

So don't plan anything. My little kid drops my vote for Hillary Clinton into the ballot box for me and I'm like, well, see you guys for the uh Hillary Clinton celebration party. What did she say? M. This is Do By Friday, a weekly challenge podcast with Alex Stuffs and Merlin Mann. So like keep in mind this is someone we've uh like basically she's my aunt. Oh my god I am certainly not an attorney. Like sta standing up there. What I've heard from everyone I know who's been on a jury is Go up, King. No, you see, the thing is taking a picture of my feet, Sun Merlin. Am I the one who lubed them? You would have missed her relationship with all of these characters that they've decided is really crucial.

Who can hate Yoda? Well if he were dead, I would've posted a picture of myself with him, but Oh. They do they keep telling you n excuse me, Madame Worsur, there are no corns here Are they always in there or just when you're there? You have to you have to see if it's a Catholic church you have to solve a rapture. Kind of wonder it's like if you have any sort of you you you look up like I have a lump here. Uh uh I don't know How do you not recognize Joe? What do you say about Todd? Go ahead. The bully is suing the school because he was inadequately monitored. It takes about depending on the instructions, probably thirty minutes, because it ha they have to read the jury instructions all the way through.

No. See how I'm taking it and turning it. Pond, you haven't worked here in years. You know, JJ, JJ's like an absentee father with a lens flare. You've got this entire production. You know what I'm saying? Hey, am I can I decide instead whether or not I think this guy's a piece of shit? No no but I'm just trying to say words. Um What a good group, the bailiff. This is I'm not mean I don't mean this to be like mean to somebody, but I did think this was kind of funny because I I think this you know I don't know. So now I'm just doing Bill Hader doing that. Like I said, smells like peacock. And uh what happens if just one day They say they that honestly this this is how they they really get you is that so what you're telling me today is that you you are you are unable It it is because I think, you know, the And I was just like, I was probably I know.

Good good good good good. What would happen if he could make computer dogs without their sweaters on? Uh they don't make them like you anymore. Why is that little boy squatting? I don't like that guy at all. I I really thought that the double twist would be Ronald turns out to be an actor who was in on it. Incredibly stressful to me. I wasn't even the guy in the notebook. I think it's a busy mom, who's very worried her about her adult son Lyle. No. Let alone your let alone your build plate. Oh god, I forgot about that scene. Uh it doesn't matter who your parents are. Uh I I think well, I I know that you will do a better job That would feel like a cock up to me. Like I don't I don't think it's aping the office necessarily, but like really even of the UK office.

They're essentially it's the same geographical area. And I don't know how far they go outside of San Francisco, but I was getting I was getting called in for jury duty uh twice a year. And it really works. He didn't need to say anything. Also sit very, very still and don't look at your phone. Guess how much we awarded him We'll be here. I I do. It usually doesn't mean it's actually funny, but that is so funny that like it caught in my throat how Do you are you following this? Just draw and quarter me. Because it's just amputees shitting, shooting up, and petting dogs at the same time. So you're this is not actually how you would talk to a judge, and I know it. I mean everybody, hey, disagree.

Oh, I know. It can be so generic. So then the bailiff took out all the pizza, so there's no food now. What are they usually in? Uh R Rachel Maddow. If you like. Where's my corns? No way is this fake real. But what if one day he's like, you know what? And what'd you do? Bushy. I'm not so big of a fan, even though he's my doctor, I'm not a big fan of the Roger Moore ones generally. Sometimes I'm not even seeing a movie, but I go to a movie theater. Okay. It's oh god. And of course we deliberate and blah blah. We're not we're not allowed to ask what the plaintiff's attorney just said. Go to hundreds of interviews, write it all down manually with pen in a table, and come in here and turn that in every week.

Every day. Ban milk because uh It must be stopped. That was a terrible joke. Okay. It's got the catchy of the sewage guy. First probably for like half the day I'd be thinking, boy, that guy really reminds me of somebody. That's my birthday. And so those are people who have tried cases themselves, unless you're one of those Trump people. The court w we arrived and did an entire court trial and it was like ten ten o'clock P. I hope not. I was still yes ending. And and right before right before this Alex Mm-hmm. It's jury duty. There's a lot of people. Okay, fine. And I said, Um, Your Honor, um Uh, I don't want to do it. They were probably in forensics. As a person who says dumb things to say. Um I um I was talking about how.

Right. Mr. That that's that's that looks like one circle. What the judge says to you is But I I said, actually, Your Honor, I think uh there is something I would love to just uh uh I think I should mention to you privately that I think might be a problem for my serving. Uh Brian Brian Cox, Bradley Cooper, whoever the creepy director guy is, I think he just probably wanted to see Psychopson with No, no? Just the the people Even if you're not as committed to it as I am, and I think Alex is, the it's the the performances, the writing Who is this for? In America. You just sit in a room and watch watch the video about jury duty. And ah I gotta go I have a baby and I have to I have a Your job is to show up and be intellectual meat, civic meat.

I'm sorry. It's gonna be great. I uh can't Hey, hey, look at that. I do not remember this at all. Um I mean I can speculate again on why, which is that there's seven hundred thousand people in this city or whatever it is. Yes, I have a serious mental illness that is flaring up at the that. I move that the How often did they just tell a bunch of people to go back there and say the thing the judge needs to hear? Right? I had a breakfast uh sandwich. You mean like those you mean like those real photos they took in the late No internet. Oh no, I I would be confused. Pogs were uh before my ti uh Uh uh they they were Did they include supports? Uh I okay, h h hold on. But the thing is every way this that fucking judge, it's like again, don't start a fight with a frat boy unless you like fights as much as a frat boy does.

Hello, hello, how are you? I do. Oh, he's mad about his books. Okay, so I actually made a shortcut for this. I I I I was wondering if Mm-hmm. Were you wackadoo about it? I will have a difficult time being it being able to participate in a unanimous verdict. Mm-hmm. That's uh I don't know if my kid invented that phrase or it's a meme, but that's how my kid now refers to Kylo Wren. And then I saw the third uh uh Well what an extraordinary job with such a piece of shit part of the story. For something that is so highly touted as being like our our civic duty, which is is accurate, it's the m it's a fucked And she goes, Yes, counselor, I agree. I haven't eaten. Mm-hmm. I'm basically like better call Saul under the under the under the overpass.

Oh no, oh no. No, I don't think so. Yeah, and sometimes uh uh uh it gives me a sense of uh intentionality. Do you guys not have eschatology in your your your church at all? You've hired James Marsden. The jury had to be sequestered. It's you know, it's just like v very different, like twelve numbers on the clock. And owing in part to the incredibly inefficient way Like their big innovation was, okay, look Well I mean, yeah, I mean I could just grab people off the street, but I have I have to drive and pick up my kid at preschool every day. Exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mm-hmm. No, I have expensive. I mean they make like over what over 20 gig files usually. Oh my god, why is Yoda not a puppet? And I I I don't write that many reviews.

Yeah. Newman, you've been on uh jury a number of times. You know, sometimes if you make it to Thursday, you're okay, but a lot of people go in on Monday. Yeah, so long story short, this kid who was a bully, this kid who was a bully No, uh j just wants a hung jury and wants a mistrial. Well like what what uh what kind of oil? But it it's not because there's if you if you're doing this and I am and I'm enjoying it very, very much Listen, I know when He's getting in as fast as he can. It really works. Mm. Thank you, Alex. I understand it would Yeah. I ended up not having to go for that one, but then I walked up Sixth Street. No, I would be like, I fucking hate cops and But they got so much of it so right about I mean He starts some shit with a kid, they fight, and that kid the bul the bullied He's very into They know I'm reading Rich Victor Hugo.

Which restroom should I use in a Catholic church? Oh, I apologize. Uh, you know. Yeah. Could you do your best? No, yeah, I do. Um I'm very concerned about ChatGPT because my adult son Lyle recently ate two boxes of my good thumbtax. All right, all right. I'm Garfield. Yeah, it's fine. So so is everyone he interacts with for three weeks. So it's Joe. You were in one, you just don't remember it. What a good spot. Why is she on a plane with you in your sh in your sh in your shoes? Oh well once again, thank you, uh Mission Impossible There's not. Well, uh here here's the thing. Oh yeah. And you see that window down just a little bit. Well also I'm not being no, no, no, no. Yeah. I hope you got comfortable shoes because Yeah, let's go, let's go.

There's a great narrative I was It's an occasional podcast with Merlin Mann. I'm always here. This is actually kind of a par part of the challenge. No, no. And we're like, oh that's I don't really think anything. Listen, the Council of Catholic Women, let's say, would very much insist Fuck it, I'm outta here. Well I I was even th thinking I But there and I I I would I would never use this phrase except in the most whispered tone, like basically into a judge's ear. Glitch feminine uh would have bring glitch feminism because that doesn't look enough like uh a social justice Says, have you reached a uh has the jury reached a unanimous verdict? Okay. Though they sent back a shrug emoji. Uh they had just walked in with Matt.

Oh no, yeah, I finished that stor I I mumbled it into the mic and finished that story while while you were off. I'm like, I I have never encountered a person in the last five years. And I and you're like, oh my God, this was how do you shoot weeks of people on jury duty? I only had one that went all the way. Okay. Can I can I just skip ahead and tell you what we were compelled by the judge? We're different people. Oh, good. It's okay with a big guy, you know what I mean? I keep seeing it and I I don't know. If that guy bounces in the uh uh in the terms of the timeline uh after the first or second episode, you don't have a show. You the guy that did the electrician? Well hat FM Which I think was a Tanesian album.

Yes. Okay. And uh it's it's a very So this guy's on the hook to be in this show. Right? What? That left me with a bad taste in my mouth. This is his best known role for me anyway. The uh the the uh the the Asian uh guy who's actually like super American. Mm-hmm. That was a dumb thing to say. x. Bushy Gorall. You got five beers still in your six-pack. They'll get very upset. What bugs me is like how if you if you had an unusually long shit Like that sounds like like oh boy, really? Like that was really awfully complicated for what we accomplished there, but you know, that that's America. There's not uh so then I just um oh uh I was like, I don't know what's It's like last week when you said would you pick a PC?

Oh, isn't that weird? Like when he says to Todd, you know, Sir, are you sitting down? Did you get real silly and talk about scoot scoots? And that is no fun. This is nineteen probably two or three. The bailiff took the pizza away. I'm gonna need you to take the whole shirt off. Usually in steerage. Um, and Just tie each of my limbs to a different angry horse and start chopping. Yeah. Oh no. There's lots of things I want to do, not that. So anyway, you're googling how long you can go before you pee yourself. You you watch 4K77? It's really good. Okay, so And then finally, ha ha ha ha, we gotta figure it out. Like there's this feels very 17th century. Oh delete. There I I I'm gonna show you a picture.

Gets big. And the uh a a person goes, uh I said something, blah blah and the person goes, Ah, pretty soon we're not even gonna be able to know Moving on. Do I have a favorite James Bond actor? Yes. That's it. No. Okay. Oh, it's so funny you should say that. com. I mean his it's a I like I say it's Ike Baronholtz's dad, but he was a I think an a They've heard every single one of those What judge isn't a judge We're making a better movie now. This is weird. It's like the first time you saw the Sixth Sense. It's it's the guy that's funny. It doesn't have feet in it. I was gonna uh Yeah but I've I've I've moved on to wood-infused uh PLA so He he's one of the gay pairs in um in Lord of the Rings And and like on the other hand, like how would you uh this must have been on your mind, Alex We should have a D.

I haven't been I tr I don't care. So it's Joe We love it Is that what you're stipulating here? Yes, Your Honor. What? Oh man. Oh my god. Uh 'cause it really was Who keeps stealing who keeps who keeps moving my shoes? The same way I I uh you know, lesbians are women but they're they're lesbians. Hieronymus Bosch 2023. Mm-hmm. Kind of person will get magnets in their fingers. That's that's your response to me But in one way, so he's been in two different movies that never end. Like it's so difficult There it is. I think uh the there's a great narrative If it felt m more like a uh I'm just trying to set Yeah, he is r I was not surprised, but I I suppose he's father. Do you understand how important this is?

I don't you're not you're not doing you're not playing the game. It just I'm just over here trying to get through the day. I am going to th then put an asterisk on that of Don't spoil that. And then he t the then the judge turns to us, you know what he says? Bush uh Bush. Yeah, no, well they literally cleave cloak. I'm getting other people's models. And like, oh yeah, what's jury duty? Like jump to leaving the room. We're not asking you to decide whether you like this person. Gets real big. And I don't really want to be the foreman, but I And and then they went up to this kid and like started some shit with the kid and the other kid bit part of his ear off. Oh, you're talking about his lady butt.

Why you would just put on the put that on the edge? But here's how here's how I used to think I'd be cute and get off. Okay. It like you can All day. Anyways We talk about face oil. So you're able to get around are do you support yourself or or are you a ward of the state? No, Mr. I am well. Uh what else? Yeah. That's more my Randy Newman. I hope that's okay. You don't really get the sense of scale to it, you know? But when I look with my phone, it looks so little. This is weird. It's no fun to be the person on jury duty that that the judge has their eye on. m. And and what's gonna happen if her adult son Lyle gets very into uh generative AI. But do you have a favorite bond? Um how would that feel in uh oh oh god that song feels like it went up on Thursday.

Uh What a Okay. It'll all be in a book someday. So like they're they're chill. I mean I know I know who's credited with writing some books of the Bible. Well it says my other shirt is a tattoo. So you so Keith Morrison, is that his name? What is happening? I mean I think some people are super it's like like so many things I think I've been on two. I'm not a nut, clearly. Yeah, because they're they're trying to one of them. It gets really I figured it would be okay if you had a reason I'll never forget. Yeah. Um so it it it You don't have any end time stuff? The characters are very funny Man, you cannot do that Title Really. But then for the rest of the time I would just be like, that's insane.

Rachel Matt are oh are in in the I mean like they're very very big. But but I mean uh I I I do Yeah. We've I've known her my entire life. Because I've seen this on TV. Yeah, okay. Oh, I feel really bad. No matter what. And then you get to Todd. on April twelfth was Yeah, it's great. You didn't notice the internet was out for a bunch of M. I'm gonna try that's a lot of pogs for a man who's sixty I mean at least the pet rock was a funny idea If you were on on uh when we left. Let's see. You're like, what's wrong with you? And um I mean the and the the judges are are so fucking stupid I change the date on my date stamp and then I put it Okay, so jury duty, it is kind of like Like I don't I'm done explaining myself to other people.

Are you unable to sit down? The j the judge have I ever told I never told you this story? Good. Do you lube rags? You sound completely insane right now, just I know. Anyway, check out your duty, it's good. If that person's feet were not in that area No. Look at this. Uh uh y they weren't specifically uh Catholic jokes. Why is Yoda flipping so much? I I just make sure you're Can you even m fucking imagine how Kathleen and George felt It's the best. Oh hey, we brought back Star Wars and Yeah. Nothing about that's funny, Alex Real quick, it doesn't need to be a thing. I can keep going if you want. No. It's so fucking funny to me. Oh so the other thing I was saying when I started making fun of you because Which fine, that's the law, whatever, but boy.

Happy Wednesday. Many concerns around AI are beyond valid. This speaks so much to I would uh that's the problem. No, no, no. So so this this If you l if you love this kind of shit, you're gonna be crazy for jury duty. Yes we have, Your Honor. Alex, because apparently he's Arnold Schwarzenegger. But then this woman walks It's um I Is this the judge? You try to sound like you have a life. He says, I'm gonna read you the jury instructions again. They literally had Like Um Why? Fine. Oh I put the wrong date on my piece of paper, which is kinda And so I was getting twice the jury duty of other people. The dog is shooting up. The way the way that he s talks, that's exactly how judges talk. But like the the characters like Jeannie is like Mm.

Although Princess Leigh was a kite for a little while and that was confusing. T H E best. Like these are all you know what I mean. You're cannon fodder for the process. It's a start. She's known Matt and uh There are a bunch of situations Oh you mean somebody who's like an agent of chaos? Because they start with a That's something you are incapable of? Have at me until I learn the trick. Miss Adult Vagina. The bailiff Because they want the judge, yeah, because they want you what the judge says to you. Oh my god. I'm just genuinely curious. That's why I'm jury correct. That would never be You're ruining this It's really a painting you don't want to be in. Does that make me disqualify? Happy And you're like I just lied.

Who cares? Oh Oh, I know. How did you how did you get here today? Keep going. Is that what you're telling me? I just Oh well But Uh raw transcript