338. Diagnosing from a Difference

He takes the medicine. But in Jason Sedakis's like um cast uh uh uh c or and class of SNL writers None of the other ones make any sense to me. And Jeter in particular says like, you know, he was having like a little bit of a not yips, but a little bit of a slump and was asking Yogi what he should do and he said, um, something along the lines of, G j get in there and hit some strikes. And I think to myself, ha ha we're doing that. I don't understand you. It's like you can just smell these things where people are trying to figure out what they have up on you and what you are fronting about. But you you you you traverse the Dom. But like a like n wap, not the song, but like the kind of like the early idea of like being able to browse the web on a phone was you would just select a number from a list.

Oh sorry, no no that's Jim. And you're like, why would you don't you're so incredulous? We were talking about I was talking about how my kid has like been cooking a lot and has been like just making these increasing really incredible first attempt foods that I can't help but want to share with people. What was she on? Do you remember credit card roulette? Ted Lasso probably. It's a bit of a bits. Think about poor Polly Shore, Wheeze and the Juice, you know? And then they said he looked like a yogi and that's how he got the name. 241. Because I knew it was going to come up and it's understandable. Fucked. Grease Monkey was what I was trying to remember. Once I see his figure coming down the hall, I time it so I also have time to put down the room like nothing happening.

I Alex, I don't I don't act on it. Take it, take it, take it take it, dig it, the good, take it, poke, paga, but the needle on the record, put the needle on the record, and it goes like Blackberry Oh. There's been numerous things like this I've watched lately that that are so interesting because they don't make any attempt to let you know w especially, you know, uh I don't know what the word is, like with a with a card. 'Cause that's how how it how it works. Yep. It's a little silly, but you've known that guy who's just intense about everything, including the intensity of instantly inverting his position about something. The they'll just hold the shot of his face with his dumb headband. Tim to me because I you know, was was not as sentient when these were super popular or i is because, you know, they were like Subtle.

They'd been working on that for a pretty long time. Yeah, for him and Doug. Sometimes it's pretty hard to just took it as yeah, not not necessarily weird uh racism. How are you? It was a series called Characters and it was six or eight um basically half hour shows about an interesting comedian done, you know, with Had sex with your mom? In nah, but I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm not sure. And that's that's Midsummer. To know that Ariaster has made like an emotional Kafka roller coaster, I I just need to brace myself for three hours of it. That my main well that poster does this movie no favors. three different ages or whatever, right? There's posters everywhere about h stay away from the naked man with the it's a news report, stay away from the naked man because he keeps stabbing people in the eyes and guts Street every single person on the street in his neighborhood, including the naked guy with the knife who eyeballs him, walk in through the front door of his apartment building.

And is the yeah, is the lobster guy Yorgo Slanthomos? W uh you put yourself through these things and then chide me for putting myself in situations that Is there a thing? Wish I did. times. Unlike you, I don't have dozens of friends at Apple. There's sure some people thrive in that. Secrets, that's a bit, but not a bit. And potentially what I should think or do differently as a result when you say bits or bits or bits aren't bits or whatever it is you mumble. Oh god, what's that drinking game? Or we we can joke about that, but we're not ready to talk about it it at at length. Nob nobody sees fucking anything I do. He's he's I think amongst most civilians today, Yogi Berra is best known for things that he's supported purported to have said that are that are funny, smart It's an attempt to like say, Hey look, let's look at Yogi Berra in this way that but people don't look at him 'cause enough with this seventy years of treating li like he's a fucking idiot.

Like he's been we lost it in the lights because we thought he was a cute funny guy with a gap in his teeth and big ears. F for shit. Something my I think my mostly my friend Dan has helped create. You're kind of being a dick. And he does he goes there and it's like he's he just wants to meet her. He is a v he I think he is he is also part of that class of SNL charac characters who You know what I don't know, it seemed like a g uh uh a good natured seeming group about helping people with, you know, emotional stuff and they got celebrities to come out and talk about their deal. I'll see if I can find you know I actually will try to find this for notes. It was the worst headline that's a good idea.

That I I that I hardly use them. Right. And you can imagine that sort of like, hey, it's Roman Roy, or hey, it's um, you know, uh Oberyn Martell. For for me, like it's not as fun for me as I assume it is for you. in a really, really good and and wholesome and and terrific way. Hacker, what do you do? uh uh bits like a catchphrase can become, you know, uh like, oh, y uh you used to be Merlin Mann becomes something like I bet that didn't Who grabs a noun and then uh adds the word educator after it? You announced to me that you are an educator. Yep. He himbelly. And maybe maybe that's mainly a testament to the fact that he that that he is fortunate enough to mainly be surrounded by people who are uh not horrible.

Like this morning I made what I thought was and I decided to make lemonade out of this. What I typed in drafts to post on Twitter. Now that's a funny joke and it's a smart joke and it gives you a minute to sit with it. Not not just why would you need 16 or 17 air tags? what I would regard as unnecessary things and and on if I'm being honest, that do not only don't impress me about you, the fact that you spent that money at all privately makes me think you're kind of an idiot. That's triples is best. Then we got married. Sho should we do should we do the the chat? Uh Merlin regrets the air. What the Oh that look that looks so cool. uh whatever a New York Times homepage or Metafilter. Uh yeah, be like uh like I was like, Well this is Thunderbird.

in the car when I pick someone up. the super conservative guy. I'm pretty sure we um yes, yes, sorry. Mm-hmm. I love it. I might have been on the after show or it might have been like after we stopped recording, but he was like, there's something I want to tell you about. It's called the leftovers. If I were to suggest this to people, I would want to frame it about it's it's a little broad, it's a little silly, there's a couple factual plumber's problem, factual errors that I found difficult to look past, but did. Did you get that? And if you weren't paying attention or aren't paying attention, you will not understand what's going on. Two thousand four doesn't count. This is something I think about and talk about often enough that I think it this it might have a name, but I don't know, but it needs a name.

MySpace, you can really make it your own and do this stuff and then what, within like a year or two, it was like popular with fourteen people in Brazil. It's so Oh do do they talk about it I know they talk about some compression in in the movie, but di did you know how to be there? how to make this thing work, but stuff like, oh you oh, you know, that funny scene, probably not real, when he says, Oh yeah, uh just out of curiosity, were you just using the one as a client? It's crazy. Uh like i think. It's like La Veli or whatever. the the your m email was already on your BlackBerry and decrypted so dec so you so you could automatically look look at it and just all of these little things that they Yeah.

And you were instantly in a competition with everybody who was CC'd on it for who would respond fast? Like it was very competitive to be for how much you could you know how that is? There's two guys that respond right after you and there's other people who are gonna be fired by that afternoon. That was like, what did the one guy say? Apple enters this field that seems for practical purposes dead, where like there's really not a high end anymore. I'm like, seriously, you're doing the controller thing? Ki I mean we tr uh obviously last week that is what was just making me like uh just s constantly scream internally. And then Drew on know that one of the most important things. No, no, no. Flashed all the phones, reloaded all the software.

I don't know, it reminds me somewhat of like another co-host I have in some ways with fan noise, for example. And this is total spoiler. Not so much from Apple, but you when you bought anything that you were going to use, and especially if you hoped and prayed it would work with your Apple thing, because you never really knew, it always had exactly that packet of shit in it. strain credulity for me, especially when it got to the whole like, you know, let's let's just agree we're never gonna lie to each other. And I d I can't sh say where this happened on the curve, but over here way on the left is, oh, it would be amazing if we could put a keyboard and And knew it. But somewhere in between that also becomes your personal lore.

I any sort of power. And it's like it was it's been so hard to accept that. like or every T V show where Horse is in the description. And that blustering through it ain't gonna cut it with the guy from End The Man played on, who I think has a name that I will eventually learn. And whatever made you love them has probably also made a lot of other people love them. And so we'll put out this half-assed thing made in a in a I d I think I I I I don't think it was racist personally, but I think they could have gone into a little bit more detail about China is a code word, not for incompetent Asian people, but a code word for a much less costly way to build this because not as much care goes into it.

uh they're different things. For it to sink in, but at a certain point it squicked me a little bit. Ha ha ha. I'm so close. worked in Apple TV, then one of us would know. One of my l least favorite, I think you should leave bits. Somebody's do reading their letter. w will r s in one three hour movie reveal to the world what it's like to have my brain. Two of the most upsetting films I've ever seen. some confidence, partly because it's sorry, I'm washing my hands with alcohol. So could I couldn't help it. Um but, you know, if I were gonna say if I were somebody uh if I were an armchair movie fan who's not a psychiatrist, yes, he's got And also with a much more Kafka-esque component. What I think it's called Erectus Ejectus.

Alex, there's numerous scenes of him looking at the phone and seeing there's an incoming call from his mom and then cut to reverse shot of his face. increasingly angry, threatening notes, you've got to turn down the music or I'm going to hurt you. I know, I know I I know. you know, your condition as people keep referring to it. He so he ends up running across the street. As he's realize he doesn't have enough money to buy a bottle of water across the street, he looks across, first one person, then two people, then then the entire Yeah. See uh and it's super enjoyable for somebody my age who grew up I mean, honestly, the golden age of English folk horror movies was before I was watching movies.

But no bits are a actual uh bits. Is it like casual racism where like no you're actually really no no no no I'm being uh stop I'm saying like what it explain to me what your bit remark means But it underlying that is an actual genuine curiosity. What what what does that what does that mean to you? hear something even about and I I I'm not saying I do this but to me a a good goal or a good end state would be to like be able be able to hear it be able to be Uh even hurt a little by it, being able but not having it like really knock you off your horse every time. This comes up a lot in the Yogi Berra movie. to them like tr like pranks on Griffin, Justin's weird hair over time, Tybee Island, Island time?

it or already was a bit throughout his life to say, I appreciate you. Somebody who can really work on the staff before you worry a lot about the implementation details. what I am working on, even though it's like, yeah, it's a it's a joke. this uh just uh uh may not maybe not even the headset. you know, did he kill his wife? it r is revealing something about yourself you're too vulnerable to say publicly, admit to or admit to yourself and it just is coming out in some different way. And I really honestly I'm not gonna beat you up. Like y and possibly a help. I a What? It there's no proof that he said a lot of these things, but that's not the point. I've never heard that. Like hit some but once and Don Mattingley he says to him well see it and hit it and he's like it like instantly he's like oh I am way the point the oh go way out of their way to make is as dumb or as silly as whatever as that sounds, sometimes you need somebody, like me, I hope, to say something so fucking stupid to you that you realize you've been overthinking this in a way that's harmed you.

And this is it's it's not easier than it seems. very much spearheaded by his very charming um granddaughter. But absolut I mean, he went to New College and then William and Mary and like he's really fucking smart, but he's also he has a way of putting things. You know, like this uh for example, the often quoted scene in Deer Hunter, when Christopher Walken or or was it De Niro Smith says this is this. One equals one. You had Mickey Mannell. This is this. Like it's like that first property you learn in arithmetic, you know, that like the um all the different properties you learn about it if this happens, then that happens. He's the the Yankees in the fifties were the Bronx bombers were incredible.

his meaty hands and speed like you wouldn't believe and like he knows where the end of the bat is and that's why he can hit bad pitches like nobody has ever hit a bad pitch. But I'm really I think I'm pretty good natured about it. Like he's gonna be mine. N d did he sort of take it on the chin, or was it something that really bothered him and only expressed that he wrote he was just in love with her. Right. on SNL and that might be the first thing actually the first thing I would think of is uh that blue guy on Thirty Rock I don't like that blue guy. Uh so I answer the question. I'm gonna tell you with real words how that what that's done for me. As a kid without a dad, you meet people who are happy to step in from time to time as your dad.

for like the role I didn't even realize they had in my life until I had the he ears to hear it and the mind to operationalize it. research improve is like Dan has always done this running bit, like Merlin's fancy. It for the same reason that I don't want to get into any discussion that I can tell is leading toward, let's try to figure out how much money the other person makes. And that helps you get through the day. Sh sure. And if you don't believe that, just watch your own behavior for a week, friends. Like all I need is like five seconds of this to go. because they're pathetic. It's it's shit like that. In some cases. a a thing that happened, which can be really sweet, because somebody's got a f may have a file card on you, or somebody may meet you and just not know what your fucking deal is.

And like you're gonna have to give some piece of you we had an emergency room trip that turned out great. that he has to lo I I think you were saying like every time someone new walks into a room in an emergency room, you need to Oh yeah the piece the piece uh sorry, yes, thank you so much. Mm-hmm. But that's a little piece of me. But way more importantly, the fact that you constantly talk about it shows me that your insides are shattered in a way that are probably irreparable and that everything you buy is making worse. Now Mary Elizabeth Winstead in season three of Fargo is fucking off the map. party and he's like yeah okay well we'll definitely uh keep that in uh consideration thank you so much for coming it's like oh no Kendall you don't have leverage on him I have other ones John Syracuse has kindly sent me.

Yeah, I just you gotta palm some feet berries here. Or, you know, the classically for me, it always fucking Syracuse. An intertitle to like let you know that the time has changed. with giving you what you know, giving you a feel for like what nineteen ninety six felt like. Um book. And this had a lot of big short energy in me. I think it's like 36 or something. Hmm. this was a completely disruptive like I didn't know the stuff about the UHF waves and like I didn't know about all the brilliant trickery that was involved in making this work. Were you on MySpace? That's the part that was most illuminating to me was did you know all that? And they're like, okay, well look, the three brain trusts, the three people he remember he says, show of hands, anybody here know how to do ABC thing with a network?

Well, because here's your problem. like a big deal until after 2000, right? Uh that is a a true thing. Yes, my Mike. But it's still mental to me that that's not being synced in the background, especially with notes. on this Mac Mini I've been kind of underusing. mm media. It's like this is can I say it? Like think think about all the stuff that Mike, I think justifiably, at least the character of Mike in this, you know, television presentation says, like, why would you want a phone that doesn't have a keyboard? Which is and he like he solved this problem. on like part of it might be whistling past the graveyard. that was subsidized by their carrier. Like he has to he has to do like the Ballmer thing of I I I I think Ballmer might have gotten it.

their interest in uh making TV shows and movies and the broader thing of what have come to be called services. They want to do it their way. I mean as as as they say in the first episode of the wire is as uh uh this this America, man. And from the business mind at that time, that's the most bananas thing in the world. When he first got his hands on the iPhone, he opened it up and he's like, Oh, we're not competing with a smartphone. when it's it didn't something he entirely had control over that admittedly then went to China. But that set up, if they'd left it right there, I would have been totally satisfied. There's a plastic bag. And it came with a the manual and it came with all those things and you had to read that to use it and it didn't even look very cool in 2008 or nine.

And it's kind of a piece of shit. they were basically a a married couple. Mm-hmm. He needed to believe that. knew they needed each other and also it w they were so separated for from how or at least Mike was from how Silicon Valley w worked and how y you know, like they they internet access onto a phone, right? And in between, you there's a shift. I totally I I do think there is a kind of like I don't know why I just I'm so tired of thinking about people in power. of it. And have always been right and always will be right. But, you know, the there's also the pee power of in any sort of, you know, p the power situation, like, uh you're disconnect a parent can be disconnected from what their kids think.

What I said to the person was, I have to admit it's been really difficult to accept that this is not my person anymore. framework that I can integrate into my day-to-day. knew what to say to that guy because I thought they did a good job of whether it's real or not dramatizing the idea that obviously Glenn's not a tech guy. Like this is this is this is this. We stay away from that. This week's challenge, watch the Blackberry Movie. Big production. Yeah. For better or for worse. Really abundant anxiety. And he lives outside his building. and the production design on showing you what the world looks like to him is Oh my god. Remember that? So like did you do you get that it's we see the world the way he sees it?

And his bag are gone with no sign. Uh who plays the mentat in Dune? Everyone should get a chance. Not a party, but an unholy display of humanity. Midsummer that he's done. Uh well uh the only reason I'm surprised you don't know Ariaster is because he's in a lot of the Criterion special edition things talking about movies he likes and he's gonna be able to do that. But even stuff like well again, more movies people won't know because I'm so fucking old, but like um Lair of the White Worm definitely has that vibe. You know, even in hot fuzz, you've definitely got that vibe. Whether it's England or not. No, no. Kafka uh uh uh sine Synect D N New York. Be trying between trying to get insane anti-trans stranger women with a fake identity versus me watching a movie that one time.

Cause I I I need to not think you you sound insane every time you say that. Uh, but it goes uh uh beyond that because once something is a a bit, let let's even say like one of uh the um But, you know, if you're making the joke, it doesn't hurt as much. Diagnosing from a difference. above my pay grade, trust me. coming out of that sort of uh like I I guess, yeah, class of SNL people Oh God, what is that? Um the the point being that I have heard this firsthand. It's the reason I want my family to carry a house key around. Bits are bits doesn't uh necessarily mean it's a a bad thing. There's a time and a place for coming. Because t I'm I'm losing twit like losing Twitter is a really sad thing. And see I just did the thing of like ah and you're not ready for that conversation.

You can't think and hit at the same time. There had been a poll of the greatest living baseball players of all time. galling to the family that Yogi Bear wasn't included in that because everybody thinks he's the silly guy who's the basis for Yogi Bear and he says all these dumb things. That can come off as simple folk wisdom, especially if he's wearing overalls, which he sometimes did. And there's times in life where you just go, oh yeah, this is this. who who did look like a cartoon character and he didn't fit in and they made fun his whole life. But like his whole life, everybody was super mean to him and they thought it was funny, you know? Would you ever say to somebody you don't know on the internet you used to be better?

gorgeous, warm they called him Yogi because w he w at a point when they didn't have benches for the team he was playing for, he would sit on the ground like crisscross applesauce. What color is this dress? Every time I'm done with my email, I get a blast, a big a big bukaki of confetti in the phrase inbox zero But I wouldn't do that by saying, oh thanks, Sherry Hacker, you're short. I think I I still don't understand, but I was almost right with the first one, which is that I think we're talking about bits in different ways. There's there is there is something sometimes that comes out that makes Stan seem basic uh envious but like And like it's almost always this little like what why do you need to tell me that you're an educator?

Anyway, now I'm just bitching. I don't sort of, it's a very gross thing that I have always done is think about, okay, what is this person what does this work person want? Should I give it to them and how do I give it to them too so that I can benefit from it? Yes. What is the room trip? You've been to the hospital. I don't I'm not sure where I'm going with this, but but the what was my big point? Yeah. for different sites. computer to sh to, you know, share something with my classmates or or coworkers and they would look at my browser or something and be like She's one of those girls, she's so cute and she's so pretty that when I found out she was like five nine, I was like, you've got to be kidding me.

For a moment. almost disco type thing. And not. Blackberry the movie two and a half times. But I love that because I love Contra again, Contra the Bits. In s in s there there are a couple times that they use years, but not all of the time jumps have a a year to it. The guy whose name I never remember, played by Jay Barashell. And I mean that in like three different ways. everybody used and they used it all the time. fast I didn't realize The Going Away or the Rising. crazy the relationships with all of the different k carriers, which is another thing we fear. But but like when Carrie always first has that meeting with the two of them, he pulls out a device that I owned in the year 2000. I this is that's so f it's like a lot like in Wall Street, you know, when uh Michael Douglas is walking on the beach in the bathrobe talking on the giant brick phone.

kind of show in the in the movie, but like are uh talking about in the book just like the lag times and like the just Yeah, that would and that was another like, oh, no one's going to want an iPhone. Not by itself at all. already becoming a thing where, you know, e even if you thought uh even though it was incredibly fast, people would just, you know, bring out Why am I telling you, you know, No, no, no, but there was that line that was such a great burn. quote, smartphones as we know them now that fraught about the addiction of social We're the company that put a keyboard on a phone. This thing it's a five hundred dollar unsubsidized phone without a keyboard and it's simply Philosophically and in terms of implementation, in terms of strategy, all these companies are doing different things for different people in different ways with different business models, and that's okay.

But all the way from $500 phone sub no um not non-subsidized or whatever, like you're gonna pay this for one, you're all can only be on singular. And that was like the his come to Jesus moment. The f the touch screen phone Blackberry makes isn't very good. Because that was hi it was his decision, right? Um, and uh it was before the newest like palm was going to c come out. They had hundreds of pallets and thousands of phones. with, you know, and he's fair to say a little spectrumy maybe. He took it out. Similar whistling noise. It it's just uh like in the way they I don't know, ca uh capture how important hockey is. Like like a recently uh disgraced twice impeached to twice him indicted uh ex-president.

sort of antisocial, slightly sociopathic, like he really is in his own world. And like Patton Oswald dealing it as TiVo, you say, you know, the TiVo says to Patton Oswald, you said you liked horses. Obviously I wrote songs about it. Grave anxiety. You know, and um so he has to go travel, he oversleeps, he's been up all night. insight that apparently no one else in your life is giving you, which sometimes is a thing I've read that friends do, I would be happy to share with you the difference. surface level, it's like, okay, yeah, this is self-deprecation because uh like in d Dave when he uh makes uh fun of it like his jufro or stuff like that, it's all things that he hates about himself. Like the great Chapor John Laney said, likability is a prison.

And uh the same thing will t happen at uh y you know, Apple. Your compliance, your self-compliance, and your constant eagerness to say yes to whatever is asked of you are not negotiable. very technical engineering detail of something, but don't know what device it's for and they like it that way. And at Apple, it's you're just I think you're just gonna be way better off if you've got something way beyond plausible deniability. level of abstraction that where you're talking about it but not talking about it? Where um where Ryan set it up, he thinks he's posting and he's really just typing in a word document. from which this movie draws its title, where he's purported to have said and of course they go into this.

facing off against, I don't know, goose gossage or whatever. Uh, from the Giants, Johnny Bench from the Reds, Hank Aaron, mostly from the Braves, and I forget who the other one was. good-natured, loving man, and I don't know, simple in a way like my friend Dennis. Um he's he he's he's been involved in the winning of 10 World Series, which as his granddaughter notes, he's had more MVPs than all of those four best living baseball players put together. You know, Bill Bill Hader, Bill Hader is has a a very small cameo in uh Bo is Afraid. And their uh BuzzFeed decided to publish the dumbest article in history, which also happened to be an optical illusion. It like like m uh Rachel Drach, I bet she still gets called Debbie Downer a lot.

Like my stuff. Or bits as in Save It for the Show. It's a classic format, right? for lack of a better word, compliments or assurance. And that I turned it into lemonade and I felt good about it. Act B or say something that would make you feel good enough about yourself that you could stop bringing everything back to the egregious amounts of money you spend on. Uh the he's in a he's one of the best succession lines. I don't like the term aging well. It's a perfect movie. And a Dingleberry is when a little bit of poop gets rolled up with like toilet paper and hair in your butt. Like i i I'm pretty picky about dumb montages of stuff from the time, but they did such a good job Rapidly ascended to be so broad and to so the phrase he keeps using, I defined a product category.

Yes. Oh yeah. when they're at work, you know, th I you just always you can do the craziest shit in the world, but the fact that you had to have that thing, you had to have it on. A little part of you was still at work or in my parlance, some part of your brain was still in your inbox even when it was empty. Ballmer focused on it, I seem to remember mainly from the angle with his wonderful success with Windows Windows Mobile and all those things. show up one day and become a cell phone company. talking to the executives and the Oh oh oh yeah yeah and like the carriers. Mark Zucker Zuckerberg can't understand it at all. six or eight different things that people were saying about Vision Pro. Well that's us you're just watching a movie on it.

Well, oh, th this is something I this is the one thing I wish they showed in the movie more explicitly is when m um I guess Mike is starting to unspool a little bit. That I mean he they were not yet millionaires at that time, but yes, they pi fixed the hardware and the they reloaded Until th he fixes something that's bothering him. Speakerphone, because it's making a above such a great setup. sh sociopathic tendencies and then a Mike's autistic uh tendencies, but also the way to understand how humans actually interact with with tech. uh like for for them it was you know capital P power in that it they were always on top and they had gotten the networks to do what they wanted mo or carriers m mostly whether that's whether that's confidence or independence or sexiness or whatever it is, be careful that because the thing you're not the only person in the world Oh my god.

Uh m the m uh oh a McElroy bit, like haunted dolls. Guy who uh everyone's like, oh yep, man, he's gonna bring his uh wizards Oh oh that you're not ready for that uh uh conversation as process. dumb, wise, self-evident things. And your thinking about this has turned into overthinking and rumination and almost a form of self harm. But at the end of the day the bit is it's it's well, Yogi Bear is not dumb. And but like it's hurtful because that man that man is one of the most successful people in this the second half of the twentieth century in baseball. To possibly spoil spoil this uh real life uh film, did Yogi Barrett like in It might have gotten lost in the i whole imagine kerfuffle I knew you were gonna say that.

you were always that guy. It's it's just more remember we talked about this last week and the thing of like never name anything after a pun because you'll eventually regret it. You point I I agree that we all do that, but I think there are very different motivations for why someone And it's a personal reason. rooms, I definitely do scan anyone I know I will have to interact with, sort of do uh Yeah yeah. Yep. And now you're in a room and people are prodding you, and there's a guy who's telling you to put sticky pads here and there, and like You break a little pot in your brain every time you buy something and brag about it. Oh, two degrees uh of uh Mary Louise Parker. Yes. The this week's challenge was to watch Blackberry.

The the the sequence of what happens after the iPhone in the story would be messed up if he a they acted like the App Store came later, right? You know? No, actually. rights to the book and it's based off of that's probably a little bit of a Kubrick, you know? if they liked this movie and just nothing but like, oh my God, so so good. Wow. No, no. In part the not specifically I mean like not because of Blackberries that day in September 2004, but because of what Blackberries did to work culture. I just keep thinking about it's a key it's a s it's a keyboard on a screen on a keyboard. I think it's an this is an interesting, very enjoyable film. knew that people wanted in the em email terminal. Because I know that.

I mean, do you do you like try to like you had like do you try to cancel fast food because they can't all do creme brulee? Because there's it's a complicated thing. Or um there's a few movies, Kafkafka-esque movies, but um there's no movie quite like Bose afraid that in an exaggerate admittedly exaggerated way It's really, really my shit. let's say push my push myself out of my comfort zone. Like me feigning how angry I am right now about this for the sake of the this the performance we do for money, me feigning that is a bit it uh it just becomes part of mm mm part of your subconsciously part of your identity. looks for those vulnerabilities and w why someone might not even know uh that they are looking for I agree with the second part.

and are respectful of other people, including his friends, teachers, and family. Would be the kind of thing somebody would say. None none uh wait wait. It would break. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. No, oh god, I uh no I'm just looking at this. And she's described in the show as somebody with an ass that could crack nuts, which I'd never heard, but now I think it's a very funny thing to say. those a around that and you know the social network everyone was like, Oh, I I get that. At the time anyway, it seemed sensible to say to yourself, like, I can't imagine this going away, let alone going away anytime soon. That's what it was. just absolute bonkers things they were able to do on on new networks or or rather networks that ex existed that no one w w was using.

Well, and I uh kinda went on that was for pretty much never really resolved. designed that new phone, its hardware and software mostly by himself was the impression. years earlier with one but it was not the um uh spa it it wasn't just but like he took like five guys I love Michael Ironside. But the same thing. Well no. We I do think you you it sounds like you're try you're about to say something really interesting, and I would like you to get to it and not just keep going bits or bits. bad. Yeah, but Basilian uh but the only reason I remember his name is because when when it when he did an interview, is it that way like seven What does it mean for you when you say bits are bit bits aren't bits or whatever you say?

Which is the exact opposite of what it does. You know, be like, yeah, that that's hurtful, but also sort of f make you feel uh hurt because And let's fight feel free to disagree with me, but if you disagree with me, you've probably never had something that got popular enough that strangers yelled at you about it on the street. Yes. I'm not gonna do the voice. And then like five five times that I heard four sorry four times. He him Billy. an extension, mainly an extension, for Firefox from back in the day that would let you do lots of things. Anti-deluvian. And um bit that are important because of the story they needed to tell. Peer to peer, the idea that like, no, it's not really it is when I say it's not anywhere, there's not any one place this thing exists.

But like, and I'm tired of trying to guess why they're how they are and why nobody ever helped them be any better. She was on the was it the other two? So you know the it all revolves. Well, cause he's like, silly is in my name. Uh that's a that's a good question. I am a stabbing robot. I can have an impact on people by giving the opportunity to to learn something in a way they didn't think they could learn it. Because we're not there yet. Hello Miss Hello Miss For our flight to Toronto I should let you know that uh I I uh I'm gonna be making a pollen berry. Robert Carrow will write a book about me. I think uh uh the Cape Balanti one is interesting, but not that f I've seen uh I like other stuff she's done more.

Yes. Yeah, yeah. It could be a piece of gratitude. This looks like a nice lady. We're doing the challenge. Remember we were told don't call him a narcissist, boo. The Yeah, and I just there are so many uh intentional time well, I th I think, you know, w each Um that sounds like a neighborhood Robert Moses destroyed to build a highway. I will do that. This was they they moved it around to make it, you know, look uh obviously look cooler, but it wa it wa like in a warehouse Uh ye y oh I yeah. I am like all of A uh Ariaster's movies. Oh, oh, oh, the guy the guy from Dune and you know the the really interesting-looking guy from Devs and Dune, the African the black guy. I've tried to ask you th at least three times, and and the closest I've gotten is that you think that it reveals a truth to call it a bit and then be able to do it.

So are you doing the bit about meme the m the one day memes people liked? You don't remember this? Where it would be like, what the fuck? Was that for um experience reasons? So like Cape Relante, I think that's her name. Like I uh uh no bit no bit, no bits are bits. I mean it's it's it's hey, saying it's it's small makes my apartment uh uh uh seem small. I need to figure out the people here who want a peace in me and how much I'm willing to just give them for a peaceful life. You don't like Justin Kirk? I l like this new theme. What his face and the subtlety of that particular geek. Like it I think now it was only a matter of time. He's Midsummer? So I think that goes for Apple too. Breaking the computers?

If you repeat that often enough, people will actually think I have as recently as this week a huge office in San Francisco that costs thousands of dollars. And like he handled all of that so well in a way that I'm not sure that I would have handled it as well. But she's dying. Was there a product called Palm Better? Yeah. Yeah. When he flicks up that huge antenna, like I used to do that at dinner as a flex. And it was I think it was like fifty dollars a month for the service. Right. Because and we don't really get why that is till the end where we learn that what at first seemed Oh my god. It's so so like I agree. Isn't that kind of it? Which is uh a book up. Yeah. Because the MPK. Hello. The guy who doesn't r the there's like, oh, let's all put on our credit card.

And and heredited. That season of true detective that begins in East Germany, where the guy's being accused of a crime because it's like Tuttle and Buttle from Brazil. I don't pine for that, but like I'm always who I've always been and what a hurtful thing to say over and over when you don't know me. That was an interaction. The first of my kid's entire life this weekend. Awesome. So I I lost that just a little bit. But it's a straight is it's a straight like here's what happened kind of Yeah, yeah. Like but it was. That's Jim. We make it in Waterloo. Don't go in the tent with your uncle? Okay, hang on. Yeah, it's like, look, it's A24, Benjamin Button. Like I have a feeling that uh Jason Sadekis, his bit of Ted Lasso is going to be like a a bit This is not anything else.

You just took the little piece of me because now that's not my authentic self. That that triples of the Nova triples of the Barracuda. Kind of a big question. Yeah. I was like, sure. I always forget his name. Obviously there's a lot of things. I wouldn't I wouldn't call it a racist name just because it's less expensive and not as good as the best in the world. Oh really? Right. Um but uh a lot of may I would I would start by getting a good executive editor. First f I'm not saying that that is something for uh any everyone, but um ye y This is this. It's like it's and that's not new. Now I'm just in holding golf room mode. Um, but k you I think you did a great j job j uh directing. It's it's a bit like you can't just be classy about it and go like, yeah, well we're just we're taking completely different approaches.

But we get to the end, he takes it out, it's his baby, he looks at it. The inside of it had a CD. I was saying I don't know. And they have this sweet relationship. And and uh talks about it because it He does. The personal reason is I need to find out. Holy shit. You could go to like a repository before we even called things like that. I knew exactly what part of I do this with my kid. Are you getting it? And they did that. The the reason I think that this um uh uh let let's say m Middle America also likes it is because there was a time where everyone saw uh the the But but did you feel turned off when you saw the poster with like, oh look, it's it's Joaquin Phoenix playing the same role at four different ages.

Yeah. Or like one that was, at least as of last night, my Twitter bio, which is how's a guy supposed to think and hit at the same time? And now I've got something called Tamper Monkey that I still haven't played with enough, but I've got a Safari um extension called Tamper Monkey that does something similar. It's an outstanding movie. What's Doug's line? It's one of the great Canadian actors. I am quite well. And that, you know, can slowly start to uh unravel and then unseed insecurities and I don't talk about it a lot. I need a way to feel smarter than this person. I don't even masturbate at it. And it's it's like I I mean it's one of those where like I would want to be circumspect about saying because i as with, for example, Bo is Afraid or things like that.

When you do that, this happens and blah blah blah. The service was was prohibitively expensive. Yeah, there's internet in this frame right now. I don't necessarily always like that guy. I know who you're talking about, but it's like you know, I said this in a song in the nineties, but you know, the things that make you fall in love with somebody will also eventually be the thing that makes you hate them. I'm Garfield. Someone's reading their letter and she she just turns and w says to her friend, party house. What am I saying? Remember Tracy Descone? Oh thank you. And they're not going to make a commodity item that matches because again it's yet another one of those products. It's already got all that what I would consider at that point kind of baggage of like given where things are going.

I've known that since before the kid was born, that that's not my person. Um Jason Momoa? And so that it doubly does that for me. Well, you see something like in his relationship with his wife is so sweet, and his granddaughter reads some of these incredibly corny letters. And it's horrible and we should all stop doing it. Do you remember Grease Monkey? It was a bunch of if you like look, there's a like a trayo there and like he would tinker and pull apart other phones. If I feel like I'm being impatient, it's because I have a thing that I would really like to say to you and to maybe talk about with you that hadn't even occurred to me last week. Like people who would never learn girls who never learned how to like me correctly.

And please, you know, don't call adult protective services title, but there's next to maybe Synectic, New York. That but that's what I mean. So like, you know, at the beginning of every one of those Hollywood reporter round tables, they always go around and ask everybody what people recognize them from, the actors from, like right now. You're always talking about the DOM. It what it's like the world's largest cell phone. Hang on. I have spent thirty minutes this morning thinking about whether I want to tell you about something. Oh so you got the feel. You know, that we learned when uh Mr. He's got trauma. That's why I'm not there. I don't know. We're getting there. No, I literally don't no because normally I'm like, oh I remember that.

He plays the um No, I don't know who that is. We're doing the challenge. Yes, yes. Like he didn't just stares at him through the window. You know that actor I know Daddy and Twink. But a lot of men on SNL are considering from a difference. It's not fun. But the thing is she's getting better. I'm I'm taking problem problems. Wasn't in that t choo I'm I'm n not just the cr cr Yeah, they had to r they had to recall a number of them. There was something I saw her on recently where she was just tremendous. He is yes, he's uh Midsummer and Hereditary. Uh fuck. Today I learned there's a limit of 16 air tags per Apple ID. Oh, what's wrong? Yeah. Like how would you go to a meeting in this? I'm gonna do I'm gonna do greatest test for you.

And, you know, unless you have the masturbation card, y you know, but most most bits are always a a What the fuck is that? Yeah, I would love that. She'd I'd let her pick the degree. Now palm berry, well that sounds like it might be from using your uh using your card, if you know what I mean. What are you doing? That's yes. So basically remember the thing about buying minutes, how great was that? And then over here at the far right end is the incontrovertible realization that this is no longer the phone the consumers want. I think it's like b the billionaire brain worms. He sticks I don't think you should watch this movie so I'm just gonna spoil it for you. I don't even know what that is. That's so that's so real, Alex.

It could be a piece of attention. I I I now not regret, but but r uh realize whenever I opened my I'm already not crazy about things that end with berry. That guy, the co w the co CEO that was like the the product guy. He would go to this restaurant, I guess where she worked. And like this, I don't know if that's like standard, but that kind of he himbilly. Fourth person that day at the hospital. I think if it feels like I I would say it's kind of early late 80s, early 90s. But worse, maybe it's what do you think? And it makes him seem completely off his nut. Oh, I see I'm not sure. Two two of the best films I've ever seen, but upsetting. I feel like I would be like, oh yeah, I'm gonna make this thing perfect and have no fucking idea what it's like.

So I mean I do it, uh it's like I'm I'm tweeting on I'm like, you know what I am? They did it to to to Yogi Berra. Oh I hate that I know that, bro. It's just people weren't listening i enough to get that. It's just there's just a part of me where it's like, uh, we're doing that. All right. And then that becomes a thing because now they want a PCU. I get that. Did I get the impression that in the movie wanted us to believe that he basically sat down and burned the Midnight Oil and m at least mostly Like most uh bits are f are fine, but I I don't know. His name's Lawrence. We used to have uh you know, llamas and dresses on Twitter and now we're mean to celebrities. This is very personal, I'm sorry.

And it doesn't matter what the joke is or what the joke is for, because everybody brings their own context. That is what I know here. I have others I've found, but I mainly listen to uh Girl Talks Feed the Animals because it's one of the greatest albums of all time. That's I mean Syracuse has got great taste. John Syracuse will read it without cracking the spine. It's you know what I'm saying? It just it falls apart in my mind. And I told him it was the sea captain did an absolute paint job. And I'm like, okay. I've known probably six people who work at Apple. It thinks me deeper into something. Thank you, Merlin. That tells me you think you've got shit figured out that other people don't have figured out.

I could hear I could hear somebody specifically saying, because this is how fucking dumb people are in my head. So many things where I have to talk about whether or not it happened before the flood. Almost all books that are even slightly successful are are optioned just be Women in the workforce, I don't know. You can't take his thing apart, that's his shit or whatever. There's a movie called Bo is Afraid. You had all these just these amazing players, and they all look like the most gorgeous, narrow Manhattan men you've ever seen in your life, except for Yogi Bear. Alright, well I'm gonna continue thinking and praying on that, and I will keep turning over bits in my mind. We're working on it.

There were a bunch for Metafilter. But pre-screll X, like the g uh you know pre-skrille And it's the world, it's the children who are wrong, as Seymour Skinner says. This is our stuff. Oh no, not at all. You can't make this into something else. Okay. Like 2003, 2002. Oh god, he's so good in that. And as soon as I opened it up, like, oh, I was like, where's all my drafts? He created this. That's crazy. I don't I don't understand how to use the other ones to to in the way that I expect. And it's really what I get from that though, I didn't watch the whole thing because I wanted to go watch the Bo movie. It is a bit and like it ca it does hurt my feelings a little bit, not enough for me to say anything, but I wouldn't say that to somebody I don't know I think no uh uh which one though?

And it's like, yeah, that's because I'm smart and I know the good the good extensions. So like you would make sure that people knew you had cool stuff? I'm sure increasingly that's what it became. They just hadn't been doing it in the way that it had been done before. This is what we make. What does that mean, Alex? I mean let me just clarify. And like you can't thank those people enough. That's bullshit. It w it's essentially the same reason. It's Jay Barashell and the the funny guy from Vine and who's the third person there? That's brilliant. This is in some ways, forgive my saying, such a timely thing for us to watch this particular week. Correct. So like that little bit, yeah, it did that it's crazy.

I'm Garfield. Like that like Senecty in New York wasn't enough, which is you know, it's put that right in my veins. And it stars an actor called um Dick Knife or Knife Dick. Patty Lupone, who's not on screen very much but is wonderful in what she does, is his mother and he has a very fraught relationship with his mother and he's supposed to go visit her and he's dreading it. You can cut all of this out if you want. But then they interview all these players who've been coached by him or play with him, especially younger players who've been coached by him, people like Derek Jeter and Mariano Rivera. Um but Bill Hayter talked about his anxiety on there and it I th I liked it a lot and honestly it helped me a lot.

It's a really, really, really, really very hard. Yeah. It's Nintendo. That could be commentators. Wait, let me real quick. Oh yes I do. I I have to I'm just I'm just remarking for the record that, you know, Ramona Flowers is a dish. I every everybody I've I've asked, I did not keep track like I do with, you know, my black and disabled friends. I mean do you remember how like for music and particular for bands how big it was? Also, you can connect a controller if you want. It's David Crone by the biggest. I mean the the I think that was uh they showed this in the m movie with, you know, hi his just Hello. You know, some of my best friends are narcissists. You used to be Merlin Mann. They tea she teases him all the time about everything, and he always just sits there with that big I always forget his name.

Not not talking about how hot everyone in Scott Pilgrim is really. This is why we know him. This is not anything else. Or like when um when Glenn Howerton, when Jim says something like, wait a minute. You misunderstand. And he now has no way to lock his door if he leaves the house. And unlike Hannah Gatsby, I think that's true and it's it's good to make fun of yourself and not take yourself seriously. We keep the honest people honest, right? But do you know how how like don't everybody if you email me and talk about how something helped your life It goes through the Dom, it goes through the style sheets, it goes through it all, and it wrecks whatever somebody thought it should be and makes it into the way you want it to be.

That's exactly how many times I've watched it. But like, did you ever yeah I feel like we've talked about this? I mean I knew about push push email. Well, th that uh to to quote political Twitter just is doing a lot of work in that sentence. How are you? But one of the things that it does that's so fascinating is without saying anything, they are constantly jumping back and forth between two different time frames. I keep forgetting what it's called. They took them out of the phone. And I'm not even I'm not particularly sensitive about that. The woman who has the Garfield house fully furnished, party house. Okay. Um you absolutely have to drink this with water. I think that bit could have this is this is um, you know, the thing of like T What whatever.

You still don't know what it is, which is fine. Like whatever it is, Raleigh Fingers, I don't know. And that even could be compliments. You know what I'm saying though? I love that movie. That was so good. Um one of the um one of the things that I can say with with I feel like pretty great confidence is I'm bummed He's got paranoia. Patreon. It's nice to hear from you. And and like you you kind of see that in the end the ending, like s spoilers Yep. I I always skip it. Ariaster has called the water. I'll come back to it. Yes. And as I was typing that period after air tags, I I just in my head I was chicken problem, right? I'll scrub through Angels in America to make sure it's an important uh scene that that he I w I try not to let him know, but I time it.

It goes back to the leftovers. You know, it's it's not it's generally when it's that high, if it's a Spider-Man, a Spider's man, or it it's a Blacksberry. Mike had the the idea to, you know, not have your phone uh ding until it Where like like it drives me crazy and this is I'm not blaming drafts, I'm not blaming notes. Is that the lobster guy? And now we will ask the jokes to please just leave the room for a few minutes while we decide, you know, who's gonna pack their knives. And and that is a bit he has because he wants to be taken as as the big serious Blackberry man. I need to decide as quickly as possible. But then he's just he'll just hold that look on his face where he's like so agog and they'll just and because he's the director, he gets to pick.

Yeah. Yeah. Ready? Warned. Sorry for you, it's simpler than it seems. I'd let her pick the degrees. Even if you don't have that particular kind of hubris, like you are we are very you're but you're very much in faster horse territory. There's also there's a actually one of my not through nobody's fault, just because of my taste. This is i i is this uh something from like white escape. Not everybody's a daddy, you're a twenty one. Or you know what I mean? Like I I also need that for like everybody I meet to go like I need a way to feel sorry for this person. And I'll just say again, my kid handled it so well. But somebody in every room wants a piece of you, whether or not either of you knows it.

One of your shoes or possibly two, because I need to make a palm berry. Like that you've met that guy who's just so excited about whatever just happened. He says, no, it's the world's smallest email email machine, yeah. And like you s you see them like. And it uh a similar thing happened Like they they constantly fought b uh behind doors, but never in front of people. And this is this. Hello. What don't tell I don't want to know anything. Oh, when I say uh bits are bits, it's whenever I'm doing I Do you wish when someone says, remember you were a Merlin man, does it not just Here goes like here goes that one or here comes that feeling again. What were we talking about right before emergency room?

Um what I what I typed uh in drafts to post on Twitter, let me find it here in drafts. Isn't she? Carrie always says if we combine Blackberry and Palm Pilot. You're new in a group. Pretty much word w I mean word word for word. He's very particular about it and he knows how to fix it. They knew people hated their their phones, but they didn't, you know, they weren't like at the Palm office. Like I'm the guy that did that and therefore the world is being disloyal to me if they ever want anything else. Prump was Mr. It's incredibly menacing. He's not listening to any music. I don't know I don't know the the names of anyone else. Did you see the wicker man? Yeah, there's elements of that character that don't seem like that far of a stretch.

So therefore, I will act like you think you're fancy. Like where you go in though and it's a whole set of things that run through the DOM, which I know confuses you. Like, wait, why is she married now? And maybe they might like love people more than you. I am very well as well, Ewell. Lady luck. Yeah, Jason Momoa. Like weird shit happens, you know, in in in full full key settings. It the the hook for the movie is that in 2015 at a game Thinking thinks me deeper into something. This morning I thought something, I had an experience, and then I thought, oh this is kind of a funny joke, I'll post this on Twitter. A lot of times it's a piece what people want is Nope, nope, not getting I'm I but in a hotel.

I think I think I had one bit of follow-up that's important to me. Oh, I agree. Yeah. I'm making fun of Twitter. And and as it becomes apparent in this movie, which is granddaughter, like I think basically produced, it's it's really much it's My authentic self would be well why do you keep talking about stuff with money? I love the light switch way high up on the wall. The m the movie. Yeah, there's free internet all around us. The guy with the headband. It it was just sh shocking. Yeah, I'm a 24 head as they call it. That's not a bit for you how much you love it and how much you e enjoy it, correct? I just don't know what that actually means, how I should ex understand what you're saying. I need to feel like I have more experience and context than this person.

Okay, he's the uh so last season of Succession, he's the the guy The app store was not there on day one. And it happened so But that changed office and work culture. Interesting thing to watch this week because how let me just say it, how much does it sound like? Like I mean, I understand that he has to be a good thing. Who would pay that for this? And I'm trying to help you trying to help you process the fact, Tivo, that you misunderstood that. com slash dubaifriday. And the men before him especially. But I bet there's a lot of employees who are like up at night having panic attacks because they have I mean I'm not uh if I'm up at night, it's not because of that. But like you know, that's just the first thing off the dome of like, you know, where And you will discover how often you're looking for somebody's vulnerability in a way that makes you feel like you've got life figured out way better than them.

Why don't you just do things that you think are are useful and that's things that have a um That could be analysis in the New York Times. And what's one of the things you've got to face? I mean it's it's almost like the introduction of something like peer-to-peer. I I it's I I loved him. The I am not doing a bit. I I listen, I've already stepping away from adverbs and it's so hard uh Like setting aside the fact that you fucking hate losing your entire Sunday. Like a a d a jazz funk synth. Where you're like, oh that's that's so disruptive that it kind of ruined the music industry a little bit. You were evaluated by how often the boss felt or whomever your colleagues felt you were being responsive.

And and when that happens, it's a great character moment for both of them. It became eventually became a CD and then a download, but usually it came with a disc or a CD, like a floppy disc or a CD. But I I agree with you. And he watches it from the fire escape 'cause he can't get it in his apartment. But I don't know if d I'm saying hypothetically, like those I'm sure Does some drinking game and he's like, oh, the Bob Okay. I'm kidding me, my whole life? I think he was also on weeds. I didn't realize just how Canadian this movie was. So it's kind of it's kind of a preemptive I'll make fun of myself first thing in some ways That's like kind of like we don't a lot of people don't want to admit how we're really sad that like we l lost Twitter.

It's n I don't I don't think it is that uh deep or c uh complex other than And so they brought out onto the field these uh I mean who's gonna dispute these bite baseball players? Like they were so good at but you had DiMaggio. Think about the guy who played Screech. It was true. They want to get to the point where somebody like me or Chris Cauldron would say, Wow, that's a lot of money. Yeah, she's getting better. Uh yeah. That oh my god. That's really smart and so not obvious. And fine, we'll do this capitulation to like what people think they want, the st stupid public thinks they want. It's just because like I don't know, I think it's it doesn't nail the cringe in the way that I like. Yeah, you know?

Uh that restaurant, nobody goes there anymore. And if you said that somebody's like, oh I know Yogi Bear is not dumb. Ha, that's right. His name's Dennis. Like, I don't think you need a degree of any kind to call yourself an educator. Four times that I heard he had to go. Because Grease Monkey was a I don't know what you'd call it, almost a platform, but you could have scripts. Well, I mean there's two problems with that at least, which is, well, I mean, probably in ways you haven't understood yet, you can, but more importantly, they didn't. That really seems like an unnecessary and hurtful thing to say. And, you know, in that fifties way that is usually bullshit, but whatever. You'd go to a website and say, show me all the ways that I can completely fuck up restyle.

No, I adore him. Because uh Mary Louise Parker and he were also both in Angels in America. Mm. That but right so that that is a I that's a letdown to me because I re-experienced the trauma of being on a plane and realizing that I forgot to Like it's just that it was behind corporate doors that, you know, the the crackberry was Yeah, I did not enjoy that at all. That's ableist. You know I love you, right? What do you say? Kangusto. Is like I can't promise you'll love this if you're not into Dorky, you know, if you're not my age and remember this time and but um like for example, I love the big short. And it was the equivalent of like WAP or, you know, like Gopher. Where I think it was like it was like trying to climb the squash uh ladder.

Let's say you're one of five new salespeople and they give you a Blackberry. And but the first meeting with him and Doug when um he takes apart Glenn Howerton's And I'm I'm thinking that I wanted to tell you about it, but there's a couple problems. Like I think that's a very, very funny uh that's just a very funny premise. Yeah, you're not going to be able to do that. This is this. People ribbed him about it and he was r about everything in his life. He couldn't afford to eat there as much as he did. I can't thank my first grade teacher, uh, Mrs. And that's so much a thing that one gender has to do much more than the other. But look at look at Steve Balmer, look at our boy Jim, look at Mike. Bad guys.

Save it, save it, save it. But like if I can make this sound go away and of course then they throw in the little bit of like, you know, kind of racist, like, oh it's made in China. I don't know. You you like I again something we talked about numerous times and But you realize there's something really penetrating about the simplicity. Because there are people who did that for me and I know what it means. When I when I think of bits, I tend to think of bits as more. That's fine for Merlin. I uh comparison is the death of joy is what the what the cushion says. So anyway, what else should you get? That is a woman woof. Like, I'm not saying I recommend it to you, but you might want to try it. Yeah, losing the signal.

And and yeah, I hope you caught that favorite line of mine. Well yeah and like treating and like that's Apple is all there's an asterisk by Apple for so many kinds of things. First of all, the boxes and everything don't look that cool. But for practical purposes it was my person. This is our this. Hello. Trump. Is he one of those is like Ruben Rossos? It's like, no, it's just it makes sense. Oh yeah, he just saw his first uh just saw his first KS, you know. Uh mostly. Yeah, like all those models on his desk and I'm like, Jesus Christ, were there really this many different models? I still don't really know what you like apart from OS OS OS It's a new OS I know Alex it's a new OS people There's a think you should leave.

Lady luck. That's okay. He sticks a f you know, you know like outside an apartment building in a city there's always those hundreds of phone books nobody's taken. So Bits or Bits is is like no step radio. This is this. Sherry, you mean like the drink? That could just be somebody who wants to buttonhole you and and talk about, you know He just left. So you think like the blast of like stuff on T and like the scene with O people in Oprah's audience learning they're getting a Blackberry and losing their mind. He's the director of the movie. Like such a funny scene and fun tension. That I don't So have you seen it? That's unir unironically, it that could be triggering for you. It's very upsetting.

For once and for all, Alex, you're gonna love you so much. Even for a drama teacher. But we had an emergency doesn't matter why. Look at that. Because it it does sound like it should either be a burger or like a oh you know what I'm thinking of? Honestly. Right? Now imagine what it is when instead of a a really cool and pleasant kid, it's the company that you made and they're rejecting your child. So when bits start to make you likable, wi which they often do, because if it's a failed bit, it's not going to keep on existing. It was confusing. It doesn't make me f feel good. We're just gonna run we're gonna run this right through Blacksbury, as the Greek philosopher said. He's so fixated understandably on if you like the one who brung him.

And I'd be happy I'd be happy to talk about it and give you some You want good leadership at the top of your masthead. And so that's why I have to admit I have adopted Merlin. Like uh it you know, it it's different around class and and gender, but the Can I can I put it can I put it in a in a in a sadder way? And it it's one of those like this is based on uh the like they optioned the But I think he believes it. He really thinks first that he is going to buy two NHL teams and then when he can't, he thinks he's gonna buy the NH NHL. I don't know if it's brainworms. Well, if the who who's that Oh, so you know this. Somebody all night long has been angrily banging on his door and leaving notes under the door So sometimes I think bits can d d hold a lot of shame.

Tracy does old school bananas. And when somebody did say to me, what do you use these for? Boo, no one likes China. So when they get to the end. When Mr. We and I never the point of that story being or that anecdote being, honestly, I never want to have to wonder if somebody got at me because you guys were careless. Like I I asked about uh Steve New York. In the same way I need to figure out um virtual re virtual reality is bullshit. I want to say that he was No, this seems weird. I love disappearing into something that makes me watch it really closely. Oh my fucking God. Sound familiar? Oh, I loved hereditary. Can I tell you one scene. So he's up all night. Sorry. I think so. So I do that in in the real life now.

In the future, Epcot will be here. And then like flunk, flung, flunk, flung, flunk, flung, flunk. Like I don't think lying's an option for Jim. Um You well I I think Or Skrillex, whatever that is. Like this is America, you can do it however you want. And I guess there was like a weird the iPhone was out or before? I love that. And it is very, very upsetting, but it's w it's it instantly went on to the weird movies for Weirdos Lists Less. He's got uh what I don't know, at least we used to call agoraphobia. He lives next door to a sex place called Like, uh yeah, we're we're super super secretive. Right? Yeah, I used to be Merlin Mann. He knows how much it helps. Which one ice cream uh n store it's cold outside so the ice cream store is closed?

I would I wouldn't m necessarily make sure that you're not sure. And it's a canonical berry title. Did you ever see Little Women, Greta Gerwigs, Little Women? I didn't know all that stuff about like the way they were the cleverness of how they were compressing things and like but Uh it makes the part right before the ending ending, especially Picant. We were not supposed to notice what a piece of shitty is. It ain't over till it's over. And what what you get out of he's so good natured about it from like the forties on. I literally don't remember this sketch whatsoever. I would figure out what what part I not just what song I wanted playing Not palm berry. Or like what wait? In the sense of like, yeah, I'm gonna get the shining, I'm gonna get Oh, wait.

And like I I got that same vibe from this of like, well what what what are we gonna do? This is Do By Friday, a weekly challenge podcast with Alex Cox and Merlin Mann. Trump was running for president, we were always admonished not to diagnose from a distance. And that sounds like a weird solipsism, you know, from a 70s movie, probably full of cocaine. Uh yeah, but legal name? It's got a little bit of house inflection. And I I should probably find this exact somebody could probably find this. The guy who runs the CDC, that uh, you know, the team that um that uh Matthew Modine is on. Oh yeah. You're facing off against these pe pictures and like His ratings are terrible. Probably just like manufactured kind of carelessly.

But but it's hard to realize it's not your person anymore. Like Dennis was one of the simplest people I've ever met. And I just don't know what that means. That that's me. Can you do that without uh first constantly telling me that you're an educator? You understand what I'm saying? I just I I Isn't it enjoyable? Is that part of it? And and I don't mean like hardware wise, I mean And it's like I do, TiVo, but I don't need you to record every Western. Mm-hmm. Um, but like Well, it got high tomatoes, but on the other hand, Bo is Bo is uh afraid Mm MySpace. So it's like, I'll just go check the internet right now here on my phone. Yeah. There's some part of him that needs to believe it. No. Thank you.

So But the thing is if there are cultures in which you're Which is all of your thinking on this, whether that's about your trauma or about your anxiety or about That was like the b uh the same day Llamas escaped Did you get a boat? It's like a period piece almost, but for the nineties. And they're the two guys who can. You're not gonna have this game on it, you're not gonna have this game on it. Oh, fuck. I don't know if it's just billionaires. I'm a little bit afraid Help me. I don't want to know a rumor. So it's somebody else's job to know how this integrates. It was confusing to me. And it's he's kidding, but he's not kidding. She's gotta be like seven feet tall. The app store wasn't there till later and Um but the oh oh Mike just I didn't realize Is Mike Mike J.

Yes, yes, Matt Johnson. It's like, well, I don't think Jim can not lie. But like it's so exhausting to try and analyze and put it into a I'm just totally cucked by them. Or like you just can't even believe what's gonna happen if you don't. A guy just, you know, or or Urbole. We had an emergency trip trip. I could specifically hear somebody saying, I cannot think of a reason why you would ever need more than four air tags. Those those words in any context are funny. And well, in weeds and Yeah, he's he's wonderful and gorgeous. There are things that that for a while define a product category, and if you have any sense Yes. The part about it. So do you like that though? And nobody in BlackBerry wanted to accept that.

Hello There's not a think you should leave. Yes. Oh man. What could be more simple? Like I get that sounds like something he has had to say, and in some ways is probably thrilled to say, right? My goodness. Like it when I was I I watched the t trailer first. And I'm like, yeah. He oversleeps. Like when there's the um Um J J uh Birch Birchell and uh uh I forget Because the guy from Scanners made them do it in China. But uh I'm a fake fan of all Alex. That could be opinion in the Washington Post. It was way slower than any modem I'd ever use. I c I thought he would not be able to pull it off. I feel well good. Now do you remember that one? Oh fully fresh. Oh it's so upset. They talked about this, I guess, on ATP or somewhere, where like there are literally people who don't who are working on some I'm still on Twitter, as horrible as it is, and as much as I dislike a lot of what's happening and the people who are there.

It's too popular. You remember that thing was a r I don't know, it kind of came and went during COVID, I feel like. And there's no way to talk about that without What a dumb weird thing that I do. Yeah. I no longer think that it was But but like if that the fact that he took it out and it wasn't responsive and so forth, like that that was all on him. Well millionaire brain worms and it makes No for once I for once, Alex, I'm not gonna disagree. Mm-hmm. Some people are just actors on TV. That's that's the top part that's hard. No whee's in the juice. Oh I get it. I actually don't think I'm fancy, but okay. Was like you're not gonna get the ding until you can read it. Okay. Yeah. I told Madeline about this.

Disag that Um I I don't have a copy editor for my brain. He's one of the greatest natural hitters of all time and blah blah blah. In the same way that in my the the latest email app that I bought. Ha ha lol So I would say it is a good size office. Don't make a palm berry. Why is she back at home? And you're like you you Facebook, you uh Facebook you need a dot edu address and all this stuff and it looks better and it's cool but like Yeah, they're No, no, no, no. He's got his wheelie bag, he's got his keys in the door, and he r has to run back in his room and when he comes back his keys I mean Well he plays a mentat, he's not a daddy or a Twink Creep thoughts. He just wanted to look at her. For some for reasons that I can speculate about but wouldn't ever be able to like What'd you get?

I love I love I love Jason Schwartzmann. The untold story behind it's it's a g it is uh it's a really fuck Yeah, I always will sound insane every time I s say it. And so then you see sort of like suddenly these nice guy type of traits So this movie. That's a funny bit. Which is on the one hand a wonderful credit to the fact that she was a great actress who did an incredibly memorable role. I mean bit as in like Glass Shark. And That's what fast food is. Hi, it's nice to talk to you again. And as somebody who is a a Bo is afraid at heart, I know that I tend to think to my peril that I can think myself out of anything. Uh and I I called it Ardvark. His big line I think was was sort of like doing a little bit of uh Lord of the Rings, like you can't just Uh the Okay, how about how about oh oh uh Raj, King of the Slams.

Is he one of those people that's mainly from another country and now he's doing English movies? I don't know. And But right? He uh um he directed the movie. Anyway, I'm blathering on not buying minutes and buy you're you're selling data and I'm like, oh I I Um but but like they It's you just you you're just c Yes Oh, I don't know. And it's a it's a power move, it's a flex. Five different people are going to ask you your name and then say no, your legal name. He's supposed to go to the airport. He's also I'm just gonna say things he's purported to have said. I want to push out your eyes. No, it's no it's not terrible. And MySpace was over and the music was deleted. Also push email. Because now when you were at home It's You keep saying that name.

It's just kind of like a line. Yeah. And it was just kind of It's a funny bit. Later. She is I think she's cute. Okay, I'm gonna say this before I look it up. So they go and break off and are trying to like figure out like There's a super high end, but the biggest part of the curve is gonna be people who have a phone that's fine. I was my person. He's completely full of shit. It bums me out a little bit that they couldn't focus but I think as a placeholder China makes sense to say That's my shit. So like he l he lives next door. Now I think that's an iCloud problem, not a drafts problem. But instead you've got to go pfft how do those people not even have any legs and a helmet in a meeting? I'm call- I'm um Creed Bratton.

Marcy and I gonna BTK, you know, out of jail. He's very good. Um I kept talking about The relationship stuff, because it was they kind of needed each other. But I think people do get really fucking stupid because they've decided that they're always right. Like all the posters, everything, everything is menacing and horrible. So a bit a bit that's a case of like you and your family and your concern about I appreci I Alex, please get my back on this. And the context of that was what do you use these for? Right. Let's say you're always the guy who responds first. And I I do I don't even think it's I needed to say to say it several times See that's that's why it's in the Tim Robbins universe. Blood, poop, whole nine.

It's the reason I want my family to have good passwords. You know what I'm saying? We worked hard, we created this product category. It's uh No, this is a strange Netflix thing. Oh, oh, it's so upset. I saw it two different ways. Uh, in so many ways. Oh gosh. You realize he's probably gonna land it, but the fact that he cannot be in that room It just And I I I admitted to Madeline. N I mean I'm not trying to take anything away from his amazing acting and that wonderful show, but you know, there I think there's some Jason Sudakis in I really feel strongly that you're not ready for that conversation. And it's not that I go like a white pine for the days when I became improbably well known. Jackson, enough.

Yep, yep, yeah, yeah. And It's I'm not saying it because I think I'm great. Oh you got two boats? Or like, wait, is Bob Odenkark home yet? I am blaming notes. We're competing with a Mac. She's so much pretty woman. There's the meeting with there's the meeting with But there was yeah, I mean there were only a few and because they had all of those I'm just so tired. Y'all don't need to stop saying it, because it is a funny bit. Ask yourself this. Uh He Yeah. That's what was like So it's got like a weird little He takes a medicine. Um This guy's being accused of something and Love at first sight. I already got the name, Palmberry. We're like, oh, this is disruptive in a way that we could not have predicted.

Yeah, it kinda makes you feel it. It was basically just like, you know, tap, tap, tap, select one, select three, select you know what I mean? That's what I'm saying. Yeah. What what does it mean when you say no bits or bits? So, you know, y Yogi Berra probably most famous for the line And like he was so he just desperately wanted to meet he's a he's a fucking New York Yankee. You know what I'm saying? Um what is trying to think? But so with with MySpace, I don't know, d MySpace was iPhone was yet another one of those products, maybe the most canonical of like The point of all of this is the thing that does come through, what a sweet All they all said this same it was something that was literally beyond their imagination.

He hasn't packed. What have you seen besides You know, it's it's not so far off like, you know Whereas today you have learned that I apparently have 17 air tags. I know exactly one mashup person and that's girl talk. But somebody made a nice remark about it and like The door closes and they all go into his apartment and have These are people who just wanted to go get a job I was prepared. Push email on iMap. It's got the one thing they nailed Alex and you might be a little young to remember this, but it used to be when you bought something Not just my mom, but yeah, every phone call. No, but really, like this is in our DNA and all w like it my I literally can't tell my family. It's a national obsession to try and figure out why you're actually better than another person.

Edgar Wright is never wrong. I love it. A Palm 7 That was my main thing. And he takes it out. I'm not trying to admonish anybody and honestly I'm not saying stop doing it, but I am but I am saying like The There's all these people with a bully pulpit to tell other people what they're getting wrong. Ardvark of memory serves might have been the one that was just about blocking elements on a page and having it remember it. Oh, uh uh uh I'm not blaming drafts. And when the guy from And the Band played on, he's trying to say like he knew what to say to that guy, especially Mike. That's w that that's weird for me. Yeah, that's that's the only one you need need to listen to. The exact moment on the show, I think it was So like I I And they're usually jumping.

I introduced that kid. And I understand that. If you bring a dip. He's uh he's got uh Yeah, no, like I'm But like, it's just, you know. Just all everyone in Scott just Mm-hmm. About like how dumb he was and he was so good natured about it the whole time. When would when did we have llamas and dresses? What being an educator, if you tell me Cool. But then the the blackberry you can't talk about how bad I mean the blackberry was the thing. And he pops the pills in his mouth before he realizes the water is off in his building. What? That's why. But it was in the internet on your phone and it had a huge antenna. He He takes some medicine. I think it's really good to be able to You know, is it those kinds of like a a recurring thing that has a basis in your life?

And if he makes one joke, it's like, see guys, I'm in on it. I still can't say it. And now she realizes and she's like, No, I'm getting him. Well, uh I I mean that's I said How many times have you run I've made some jokes about this? So Justin Kirk. Who's gonna buy that? They they would never disagree. You can play any position. I can't thank my twelfth grade drama teacher, Sherry Hacker, enough. I'm already peop hearing people going, why would you ever need I have now watched No no no Mike Mike Doug is uh Glenn Howarton. That It's oh oh oh Um But it's really pretty good. And so I was what I posted on Twitter was Is there so is there a way that I could make this more efficient for both of us?

But you were kind of hoping somebody would go, oh that's cool, what's that? I'm too I'm too stressed. I think the first part's manifestly not true. That's f I think he was on weeds. Which is like they do it really. I I said you might like this. And maybe not always for a I g I guess I thought it in my head I'm remembering it being around longer than it was, but it wasn't That's like, oh, what a good way to put that. And so I wrote a bulleted list and I explained how I do use them. Oh okay, yes. You just I don't know. Exactly. You don't live in a hotel. And then he keeps t texting him about it. But it still drives me nuts. That was the kinds of demands that you could make about somebody. My child is a blackberry.

I'm saying it because Instead of instead of a three hundred square foot shoebox where the rent hasn't changed in twelve years. Well, well, well. And like the first one you learn is that like one equals one. I always wonder who runs things like this at Netflix, but Okay, so anyway, he has this medicine and in no uncertain terms, maybe this will help you with your I'm thinking of a dingleberry. And with Blackberries, again, you can't tell these kids, but like this But like that but uh there was a time when they realized that would meet a consumer demand. We can't just like go start over Love that actor. You'll see this photo if you look at my Twitter. But there was this I guess it was like a YouTube channel for some kind of a I love everything about that movie.

I made that kid love comic books, and then the kid saw Spider-Man without me. Yes. It's like the Dr. And There's no controller. He sticks a phone book in the door to keep it shut People washing dishes. What like fin tell me with mouth words what that means? But when you say something is I don't Well, again, it's a high bar. The piece of you. I'm so confused. Oh it's a joke. It it means that whenever you are doing a bit That's why I'm still there, Alex. And it was heaven. But uh look m I've asked a number of normal people No, no. But sometimes you need to remember fucking It's like like a lot of movies I like that are smart and that you have to pay attention to. Most recently perhaps That's me every phone call.

But just, you know, remember when you say that to people Um let's see Willie Mays. Oh just all those things that They they had like a parent to I I it It's like Synectic in New York, but more So like I saw the wicker man later. I I'm too blessed to be stressed. You got triples of the nail. Like um I had a I just put the beta. It's a bit and it was one time. She she she she's Ramona Flowers. And I I wonder if you got any of that feeling as well. Like they In Do you know how much I deeply appreciate people who What's the piece of me yeah that we're gonna have to give God handsome guy, Justin Kirk. He's a he's a baby. Well now I'll check out more PhD of Twitter bios. She was a supermodel. A dingleberry.

What's happening with this movie? Like, what do you think, palm berry? I think the reason's always the same. No, that was that was It's inscrutable. And I love young Neil You know to convince me That really places it in American culture for me. At the beginning of a class. I'm in on it It was perfect. How often do you run across somebody It's called it's called the dentist system. If it isn't the bus driver I I love when she turns. This is the thing. He's wonderful and gorgeous in Angels and Amaz. When he pulled that out, I was just like You got triples of the bear, too. Like it's just Like it truly does yes. It's the one I understand. I had a poster on my wall. He r I really think So Well one thing I will say with I This is the thing that'll undo me.

No, it was per I'm it was the Oh. Like the way you'd use you know not gopher, but like Barrishal? He looks really young, yeah. What And Triples is bad. Right. raw transcript